This question is for moms. A daughter and son is most helpful.?

After living with my father for half of my life I have recently moved in with my mom until I join the armed services in March. I would join sooner but I have some problems and things holding me up with a court and judge and crap. I moved in with my mom just for a little bit (more for her because she wanted me to) until it's all been settled. Now I've got a job and always helping around the apartment, cleaning, taking the dog for walks, everything. My 16 year old sister is lazy, spoiled, and incredibly naive. She has always received everything from everyone from not only being the popular one in school, but the favorite of my parents (not that they love her more, just more likely to ease up on her). She is at school, comes home and sleeps for a couple hours before going off with her boyfriend. Now I can't stand how lazy she is and we're always getting into a row. My mother will always back my sister up and use excuses to try and cover her. My sister maybe works 10 hours a week at some clothing store job she got out of luck. She's always complaining about working and just recently my dad gave her a truck for when she got her license. Now I'm not complaining about it, I bought my first truck and I'm happy, Oh, here's the kicker. My sister doesn't like the truck she got so she's just going to sell it and get a car she wants while I gave my father my truck so he'd have a vehicle that doesn't guzzle gas (he's got a giant ram f-150 and that kills gas) he's also got a harley but I gave him my truck so he'd stay off it because he's been in two accidents, he's actually still healing from a broken leg injury he got 7 months ago. And I can't stand she doesn't even appreciate what she has. I've paid my own way. And I know this is going to sound bad but I have been recently telling my sister I hope she dies, (which is in all honesty the truth) I know I'm not the nicest person in the world, but I can't handle lazy people, they disgust me and piss me off to no boundaries. I've been trying to tell my mom I love her and it's not her I hate, but she just won't listen to me. How can I help her realize it? I know half of you are going to say stop fighting with your sister, but that won't work. I cannot tolerate lazy people and i try to show my sister reason. I actually just got into another one because after working 5 am to 4 pm I wanted to watch the insight bowl with minnesota and iowa state, but my sister comes down and starts nagging at me so she can watch some movie, and then gets my mom on her side and now I can't watch the game. How can I show my mom I love her but just hate my sister?This question is for moms. A daughter and son is most helpful.?
1. Your sister is 16 and younger than you. She'll always seem more immature and selfish, because she is. Just because you put your parents feelings before yours doesn't mean she ever will. It has nothing to do with you being a boy or her a girl. It's just the way some people are *has 2 very selfish sisters, but got over it once I realized I can't make them change*.





2. Never wish someone to die unless you're ready to actually deal with that situation. Your sister selling a gift that she doesn't want may be rude, but in no means worth her brother telling her she wishes she were dead. This is very immature of you.





3. You need to learn just because you're considerate of your parents doesn't mean you'll be rewarded. It's like volunteering. It makes you feel good, it makes your parents feel good, but you can't expect to get anything else from it. You'll just end up disappointed.





4. You don't hate your sister. If you do then your tolerance for others is slim to none. You dislike her actions. You dislike the person she's growing up to be. You dislike that she takes advantage of your parents. Hates a powerful word and I can't blame your parents for not listening to you if you start off a conversation this way.





Instead of saying ';Mom, my sisters an idiot'; you can say ';she's inconsiderate of your feelings and that bothers me, because I love you and want to protect you from being taken advantage of.'; Your mom will probably laugh it off, but later on when she realizes how much your sister has taken she'll confide in you about it (said from experience). However, it's your parents money. If they want to waste it on their daughter then so be it.This question is for moms. A daughter and son is most helpful.?
This is a difficult situation that you're in. I can feel for you that you don't get anything that you want. From the situation what I can understand is that you sister has been living with your mother for a long time and she has been used to getting what she wants when she wants it, and your mother backs her up with the fact that they have been living with each other for a very long time. Since your mother is offering you a roof over your head, and a place to stay until things get sorted out, you're like the guest in the house, and not part of their daily ritual. I understand that she may appear ';lazy'; to you, and maybe she is, but the thing is that you have come onto the scene, and they are just doing the things the way that they did prior to your appearance at their place. If you don't want to have to get along with her, or want things to go your way, then you might want to start to look for a cheap place that you can have, in which you can live the way that you're accustomed to. JMO.
tell her everything you said here.


if you can't make your sister see reason,


try to get your mom to.


show her what her and your sister's actions do to you,


but clearly explain that you do love her.


you don't have to say you hate your sister,


you don't even have to say any of your feelings toward your sister.


just tell her how your sister's actions affect you,


and how your mom's reaction to her actions and


your arguments affect you.





good luck with your mom.


^_^

















(%26gt;'.')%26gt; hug?? %26lt;('.'%26lt;)
Perhaps it would be better for you to move back in with your father until you leave for the military. Before judging your sister so harshly, you should probably take a good look at what your life was like when you were her age. However, since you were living with your Dad, there is a completely different rule set that needs to be taken into consideration.





And it is very, very bad to be wishing your sister dead. Whether you believe in Karma or not, a wish like that is likely to come around and bite you in the butt.
Number one never ever wish for somebody close to you to die...you may think you want them to but how would you really feel if she died tomorrow? besides that i think you are fighting a losing battle. your mom will never change how she treats your sister and your sister wont change until she grows up. i truly think that you are a good person for what you do but are your intentions to do good deeds without having a motive or do you do them just to prove how ungrateful your lil sis is? tell your mom the truth....i would leave out the part about hating your sister though tell her that you love her but are going to move out and stay with friends if things don't let up! or if you wanna do it the hard way just be lazy yourself!!!! don't walk the dog and don't clean up after yourself and see where that gets you. i bet your sister will have something to say! just remember karma is a mofo and she will get what comes to her you cant ride the gravy train forever!!!