My Boyfriend and I fight ALL THE TIME!? Please help us stop fighting. I want to stay together.?

We want to stay together, but the past few months have been constant fights...and I think it's his fault that they start.


Examples include last night on Msn where we were talking and happy and then he said, ';brb. I'm restarting the computer.'; and he was gone for 1 hour. When I was about to tell him that I had to go to bed and had know clue what happened to the ';brb'; he responded and was like, ';I have to go to bed.'; and I was like, ';why did you leave me hanging?'; and he was like, ';sorry. I was trying to install the video/audio on your comp[long story]';


And after like two minutes I was just like, ';Watever. Good night.'; and I get the feeling he's mad at me for pointing out that he was gone (we haven't spoken today)


For the past couple months I have been buying everything on our dates...food, surprises, etc. and then he bought $5.00 costco sushi for me and his sister. He seemed fine with it until we got home and he was like, ';I pay for everything!'; and he was muttering stuff like, ';you don't even know how to eat!'; to me (he's CHINESE, I'm WHITE)so yea...I'm still not great with chopsticks.


Also, I'm 18 and he's 25 AND he told me that he also believed that men should provide a bit more for the women, but he wants me to pay half of everything (although I have been paying 99% lately...he ignores that).


It's my bday next week and he wants to go to a mall restaurant because Ill get in 4 free.


He's looking to buy his sister a psp(around my bday)...which is fine...but he can't even give me a quick massage(free). Ill give him hour long full body massages and then he ALWAYS promises to give me one the next day (and never does).


What gets me mad is that I fell in love with him and now he's changed. He used to be a gentlemen...he would take me out to nice restaurants ';just because.'; and when I got him gifts (which I do alot) he would cherish them...now he just throws them aside.


I'm so tired out. I'm trying to do well in school and get a job and then when I'm with him I have to take him out, give him bjs/massages, and I don't even feel comfortable like I used to. I'm always on edge now...he'll get mad so randomly...a couple weeks ago we finished watching a movie (at his place) and I was happy and like, ';wow! That was scary, agree :D'; and he freaked out at me and was like telling me how annoying and awful I am for doing stuff like laying on top of him for a few seconds randomly (he smiled when I did that) and for getting too close to him when we sleep and then when he finally made me cry...he yelled at me for that too.


I keep trying to avoid fights..but...it seems they keep happening because he freaks out over everything now and if he's not freaking out, then he does rude things like ignoring me or the brb situation! I'm scared that I'll do something wrong and make him mad.


I love him so much, but I don't know what I keep doing wrong.


If anyone has gone through this...or in general can give some needed words of advice that would be great.


I'm feeling really depressed.


Thank youMy Boyfriend and I fight ALL THE TIME!? Please help us stop fighting. I want to stay together.?
He's got your # thanx to you. You've got a user


and pretty soon, an abuser!


Oh why oh why do women pick this kind of abuse and


always find a way to justify it, is beyond me.


Is it an option to just leave and find someone else???


Someone different that will love you and respect you??


Sorry, to ask, but will you even consider it??


Sorry I asked.My Boyfriend and I fight ALL THE TIME!? Please help us stop fighting. I want to stay together.?
He is a jerk, dump him.
that story sounds like a load of sh*t, are you by any chance under the influence of alcohol?
He's scared you'll see his tiny *** dick.


Just dump him,sounds like a complete *** hole
HIT THAT MOTHER FVCKER BACK
don't waste your time!


Leave him before you get hurt even more.
sorry but it sounds like he is kind of selfish and hasn't come through for you even when he pretends to be a good guy. my advice give him up if he doesn't have u maybe he will appreciate u better if nothing changes find someone else.all couples have problems and have some bad fight spells where u fight about everything but both have to see that there is a problem ur boy is either (no offenseintended) blind,dumb or really does see doesn't care as long as he is getting everything from you. plus he sound like he puts you down as a way to make you feel like you are the one who is wrong and hurting u verbally and the only thing u are doing wrong is letting him step all over you be strong and leave him he needs to change because so far you are doing all the work!
OMG girl he is not worth it. Seriously he doesn't care about you this dude having 25years old probably just try to that advantage about you (i hope you have done not more then spending you money on him...) So is no case for you to try to force him to like you cuz is so obvious that he is not interested on you anymore. You are very sweet girl i can tell by all that you wrote all the food on dates, gifts, massages, etc. Girl you are a great girl (the sweet loving girl i like =) ) so i recommend you to finnish your relationship is the best for you it may hurt you alot cuz u are into him but he doesn't that Chinese is avoiding you i can almost tell you HE IS PUSHING YOU AWAY! leave that piece of ****! (srry) girl PLZ dont be depressed HUGZZZ dont cry for that guy who is next to Nothing!!! Luck be strong =D
If you dont want to fight...why are you so negative about your boyfriend. Have you ever considered that your feelings of anger are not any more valid than his feelings. Learn to accept him as he is and he will listen to you. Men never grow with a partner unless that partner accepts him first its a trust thing.
You are fighting for absolutly nothig.





If you love him and he loves you, you should be able to stop fighting.





But if you are really not having a good time with hime, you should break up
one solution:


break up with him


i'm sure there's alot of guys out somewhere


who would love you


i think you're too great for your boyfriend


if i were you, i would end the relationship
ive been in a 7yr relationship with my man, and the massage thing made me laugh, i think all men do that to us girls.


One of you needs to stand up and walk away and refuse to let the argument go on, say i don't know why we are arguing on little things lets just relax, im going for a walk.


The start of our relationship was hard he was going through his own issues and taking it out on me, you need to find out what is stressing him out cos its not your fault, he is trying to push you away, if he is saying he wants to be with you he wouldn't start arguments over little things.


get to the source of whats wrong with his life at the moment, and try to help if you can, don't put up with it cos he will always treat you like this.


It took a good two years before i found out that in his past he had some family problems that affected him and i told him its not his fault and stop taking it out on other people, and that i love him and that im there for him but if he doesn't try and work his stuff out im gone. he finely sorted it out, now we are very happy and have a 3yr old son.


You may have a happy ending and maybe not, give it a chance but don't put your mental health at risk, maybe step back from the relationship for a little bit so he can work out where he want to be in his life.
Tell him that he needs to put more effort in the relationship, i know that you want it to work out but hes the one who's making it difficult hes showing you no respect, or politeness. First defend yourself, speak up tell him how you feel and make sure he understands if he denies your thoughts %26amp; feelings then ignore his ignorance. Counseling might be able to help or you might need to end it. Sad but true picture what your life would be like if you two got married [scenario]. Mostly empower yourself and don't let him think hes in charge of the relationship because it involves two people making it work not the women paying and doing everything also you can ask him on some ways that he would like you to change, change only if you think it is appropriate and worth it.
You are 18. He is taking you for granted. I don't understand why you still want to be with him. The general public calls your role in this relationship ';the doormat';. You need to work on your esteem and realize that there are many more men out there. And if you two are meant to be together, it will just happen in time. Until then, take a break from him and let him see just what he is missing because of his silly behavior. Good luck.





Oh, and by the way, I know what it's like to be in love with someone who is a jerk. And I left him because he wasn't mature enough for a relationship. And even though it hurt, I survived. And now he is a wonderful father and husband like I never would have imagined. He just needed his time to grow and I didn't feel like watching him do it. Just so you know, I completely understand. (But my guy NEVER let me pay for anything, in fact he took care of me so I could go to school and not work, he was also closer to my age- I was 18, he was 20-so this may not be the exact same situation)
Be the maure one in the situation, and do whatever it takes to control our anger by being tactful, not argueing about everything with him, and let him get his way for a while.
Sounds like you need some time apart. Hard to tell without his side of the story but he might feel smothered or he might have changed. As relationships grow people change and sometime guys don't feel they have to go as far as they did for women once they have been in a relationship for a time. Sit down tell him how you feel and ask him how he feels, Try and work it out without getting in a fight.
only someone with no life is going to read all of this lol.


In conclusion, just break up already, you don't want to fall too deeply in love and then have to break up or have him end it and break youre heart. Just go youre separate ways already.


HE DOESN'T DESERVE YOU. LEAVE HIM
There can be no fights, if you don't participate.





First, do not blame anyone. There is NO value in laying blame.





Look after yourself FIRST, because if you are not happy, no one around you will be happy.








Do not try to hurt someone's feelings, just so they know what it feels like. It doesn't work.








If you mature and your boyfriend doesn't, then maybe you might outgrow him too.