Ok so 5 months ago my boyfriend moved in with me and brought his dog. I already had a 7 month old male pitbull that wasnt fixed. If u have ever seen Marley and Me that would describe his behavior. Very energetic hardly sits and loves running has had his share of mishaps but hasnt destroyed anything lately =). His dog is almost 2 years old a pit female and has been fixed. She is very calm and doesnt show much emotion. He baby talks to her carries her around and is truely in love with his dog. it was his first and he has no children. Im not as sensitive as he is to his dog as i am to mine. I have a 4yr old that comes first and i have had dogs in the past. I love my dog but im not obssessed with him. Well the problem is he says his dog is an angel and doesnt do anything wrong and my dog belongs in a junk yard outside. He is mean to my dog yells at him for ';running in the house'; or for licking his dog. he Hits my dog and does this all in front of my daughter. he says that he used to do that to his dog and now she is good. I tell him to stop please dont do it. my dog is afraid of him and doesnt know how to act when my boyfriend is around. i told him take care of his dog and ill take care of my dog but he pretty much demands me to get rid of my dog or else. I have suggested we get rid of both of them and get a dog together but i know he would rather break up with me then get rid of his precious dog. i have a feeling of what everyone is going to say but id like to hear your opinion. We have been together for 5 months now. We fight EVERYDAY about the dogs. When he looks at my dog u just see the hate in my boyfriends eyes. and if he cared about me u think he could deal with my dog. i just dont know what to doBoyfriend and I are about to break up over my dog...is it worth it?
Wow.
Your boyfriend is beyond belief.
Kick him out now, today, immediately.
I have 2 dogs but there is no way they are more important that the woman I am supposed to be in love with.
Kick the cretin out.Boyfriend and I are about to break up over my dog...is it worth it?
Maybe he should spent some one-on-one time with your dog to just show him how nice your dog is, or you could maybe get him fixed?
If all else fails, kick him the hell out. If your dog isn't aggressive, then i dont see what his problem is. He should learn to control himself around your little girl aswell. No offense but he sounds like an idiot.
Oh, and he has no damn right to hit an animal. Dont ASK him to stop hitting your dog, TELL him to stop.
Get rid of him and his dog.
It's very simple, give your so-called boyfriend the flick, you don't need the aggrevation, especially around your daughter. Don't worry, the right bloke will come along, someone who respects you, your daughter and your dog
this could be worse it could be him making you choose him or your child and from there whats next? think about this in the big picture%26gt;............Is this the kind of man you want in your life ? He can not see past his ';dog'; to make peace in your combined living space...if it were not your dog what else would he pick? ...put him out and his dog ....Your dog was there first ....he has no respect for your dog ? so when he finds things wrong with how your child acts will he suggest you give up your child? he is not happening .
If he is abusive to ur dog who is to say he wouldnt be that way with you or ur daughter. They say it all starts with an animal. His dog may be calmer bc she is fixed has alot to do with her personality. Since your dog is not fixed he is a typical male and he goes thru heat just like a man. If you dont wnat your dog fixed definitely dont get rid of him for ur BF. ur only with ur bf 5 months and you dont know what could happen and ur dog will be there til the end. Did u ever think about taking ur dog to a training class or looking online to see if there is a way u can work with him on ur own to make him calmer. There is ways and I know that if you keep him (ur dog) occupied that it can help alot like iwth toys and stuff. Your bf is a dog lover but sounds to me he is more in love with his dog than with you and u shouldnt have to give up anything. He clearly wont so y should you and besides u have a daughter tho she is young i can amost guarantee that she has a bond with your dog. Also need to remember your dog is still a pup. IF you really want all this changed and wuick have him fixed it makes a difference.
Man, that's one really lucky b * t c h..i meant the dog...
If he is threatening you with your dog than I don't think he is a good boyfriend. If he had to chose he would probably chose his dog over you. He is not worth it. Let him go and don't let him control your life like that anymore. Also he should not be hitting your dog, its yours not his and what do you think he would do if you hit his dog?
My boyfriend didnt like dogs before he met me. I have a dog and he has learned to love it. I tell him that when we get married i am going to take my dog with us and he is okay with it. He even worries about my dog more than me cause every time he goes to my house hes like ';Have you fed Stripe already';
If he's abusive towards animals, for me that would be a huge red flag. I don't care how he justifies it in his own mind, it's not right to strike an animal period. Have either of you actually considered training the poor dog? The more manageable he is, the better your boyfriend will be able to deal with him. But the hitting must stop immediately. No ifs ands or buts.
don't break up with him because he's crazy for dogs break up with him because he's a crazy ffucckk!
Here's a new twist on a ';love hate'; relationship. He loves his dog and hates yours. I'm surprised he doesn't treat your 4 year old the way he treats your dog. If he did would you allow it? Why allow him to treat your dog this way? It is insensitive and immature. Tell him he and his dog are permanently in the doghouse. You, your child and your dog deserve less stress and he is not a good role model for your child.
Friday, August 20, 2010
Do you have a food or any other addiction and want to quit?
How are you dealing with it? What is your addiction?
Mines is junk food, to avoid it I don't buy it. My kids always ask for cookies, instead of cookies I give them yogurt, gold fish, and healthier snacks. Because if I buy the cookies I'll eat them all if I see them in the house. I get these really bad late night cravings. It started after my last baby, I became this junk food freak. So to keep me from buying junk, I have to bring my boyfriend with me. He is the one that will be telling me ';Girl you don't need that'; lol I don't buy candy though, candy is not my favorite.
I am trying so hard to fight it, but it's hard. What keeps me from buying it is when I go down that cookie section and I see a 400 pound woman...I make a quick u-turn fast. Nothing against overweight people I just don't want to be overweight. Even though I exercise, I still have this addiction. I feel like I will be having weight issues afterwhile if it doesn't stop.Do you have a food or any other addiction and want to quit?
wen i eat a cookie i want more so i try to stay away from it.. its usually when im really bored that i want something to munch on... now i like to munch on berries its healthier anyways.. but yah its good that u dont give ur children any junk food!! ..i have a 1 yr old baby cousin who is obsessed with coke!! they let him take sips once in a while and i think that is sooooo bad!!! i would never ever let my kids eat unhealthy specially at such a young age..thats why they grow up to be obese and i think thats just sad!Do you have a food or any other addiction and want to quit?
Yes I can't seem to stop answering these stupid questions
mine is sweets and pop. i'd love to give up both, but like you when surrounded by them it's hard.myspace commentes amortization
Mines is junk food, to avoid it I don't buy it. My kids always ask for cookies, instead of cookies I give them yogurt, gold fish, and healthier snacks. Because if I buy the cookies I'll eat them all if I see them in the house. I get these really bad late night cravings. It started after my last baby, I became this junk food freak. So to keep me from buying junk, I have to bring my boyfriend with me. He is the one that will be telling me ';Girl you don't need that'; lol I don't buy candy though, candy is not my favorite.
I am trying so hard to fight it, but it's hard. What keeps me from buying it is when I go down that cookie section and I see a 400 pound woman...I make a quick u-turn fast. Nothing against overweight people I just don't want to be overweight. Even though I exercise, I still have this addiction. I feel like I will be having weight issues afterwhile if it doesn't stop.Do you have a food or any other addiction and want to quit?
wen i eat a cookie i want more so i try to stay away from it.. its usually when im really bored that i want something to munch on... now i like to munch on berries its healthier anyways.. but yah its good that u dont give ur children any junk food!! ..i have a 1 yr old baby cousin who is obsessed with coke!! they let him take sips once in a while and i think that is sooooo bad!!! i would never ever let my kids eat unhealthy specially at such a young age..thats why they grow up to be obese and i think thats just sad!Do you have a food or any other addiction and want to quit?
Yes I can't seem to stop answering these stupid questions
mine is sweets and pop. i'd love to give up both, but like you when surrounded by them it's hard.
I want some energetic songs!?
Normally I just kinda look for awesome bands but I'm in an energetic mood.
Stuff like:
I Like You So Much Better When You're Naked - Ida Maria
Halfway Home - Tv on the Radio
Don't Stop Me Now - Queen
I Fought the Law - The Clash
Enjoying Myself - 1990s
Take on me - Aha
Handstands for You - Chairlift
Song 2 - Blur
I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You - Black Kids
Love Will Tear Us Apart - Joy Division
Walk of Life - Dire Straits
etc.
I just want jumpy awesome songs
=]I want some energetic songs!?
The Scissor Sisters have some great ones, like: Take Your Momma Out, Don't Feel Like Dancing, and She's My Man. BTW, I think it's great that you have such eclectic tastes in music. I love all different types of music and bands. This band just came to mind when you said energy.I want some energetic songs!?
The Workout by Utada Hikaru, the lyrics are a little strange but its very energetic :D
Datarock- fafafa
Stuff like:
I Like You So Much Better When You're Naked - Ida Maria
Halfway Home - Tv on the Radio
Don't Stop Me Now - Queen
I Fought the Law - The Clash
Enjoying Myself - 1990s
Take on me - Aha
Handstands for You - Chairlift
Song 2 - Blur
I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You - Black Kids
Love Will Tear Us Apart - Joy Division
Walk of Life - Dire Straits
etc.
I just want jumpy awesome songs
=]I want some energetic songs!?
The Scissor Sisters have some great ones, like: Take Your Momma Out, Don't Feel Like Dancing, and She's My Man. BTW, I think it's great that you have such eclectic tastes in music. I love all different types of music and bands. This band just came to mind when you said energy.I want some energetic songs!?
The Workout by Utada Hikaru, the lyrics are a little strange but its very energetic :D
Datarock- fafafa
My friend ditched me for her boyfriend and people who aren't true friends. What should i do?
My friend Sam (not actual name) totally stopped hanging out with me! Ever since she got a boyfriend she's been totally mean. And she invited me to go to a high school football game with her out of the blue and she said ';Your mom's driving though.'; I got so pissed, i mean she always makes my parents drive! (I don't have my license yet). And i found out all of these mean, stupid (do stupid and irresponsible stuff is what i mean by stupid) girls that she calls ';friends'; and her boyfriend were going to be there so she pretty much used me so she could go and leave me while she was off with other people.So she and my friend Carly (not actual name) got in this HUGE fight because Sam read a text on someone else's phone wrong and thought Carly called her fake. And know all of Sam's friends have been causing Carly out in the halls and all that. I want Sam to knock it off and i REALLy don't want to be her friend anymore. But i don't know what to do or how to talk to her and stop being her friend because we've been best friends since 1st grade.My friend ditched me for her boyfriend and people who aren't true friends. What should i do?
Just because you have been friends with someone for a long time does not mean you are obligated to remain friends with her especially when she misuse the relationship. Stop going against yourself for Sam, you are going against what you feel about yourself to please her, that's not right. You must find reasons to avoid her, tell her your parents have other things to do when she insist on your parents to drive. Or straight out tell her that you had rather not go. Enough of this will discourage her from wanting to bully or use you. Sometimes you just have to stand up for yourself for the other person to see that you are worth respecting.My friend ditched me for her boyfriend and people who aren't true friends. What should i do?
find another friend...somebosy who's really true and not fake.
It might just be because shes just excited she has a boyfriend if she doesn't pay attention at all to you anymore than why should you to her?
It is never easy to move on without closure. However, you must ask yourself if ';Sam'; has already moved on. With any relationship, there is always something brought to the table, and something taken away. It seems that while Sam expects for you to bring yourself, your time, and the use of your parents vehicle to the table, she has made a decision that she will only bring herself, and that is only when it is convenient for her.
If you love yourself, understand that not allowing someone to use you doesn't mean that you should be mean to them. Instead, understand that if all you are getting out of this relationship is a friendship of convenience, that is all you are obligated to bring in return.
Good luck, because it sounds as though Sam is a very selfish person. The reality is that when she realizes that she cannot ';persuade'; you to be her convenient friend anymore, she will probably show the ';real'; nasty side of her . I think that then it will be much easier to make a decision as to whether or not you want this type of ';friend'; in your life at all.
you need to try and sit down with her and talk about the way she has been acting. Try not to come of rude or mean though because then she wont want to talk to you. Tell her how you feel and see what she says. If you have to, give her an ultimatum. its eitha you or her boyfriend.
dont be a friend with someone u know isnt one. Find another. a TRUE friend
Just because you have been friends with someone for a long time does not mean you are obligated to remain friends with her especially when she misuse the relationship. Stop going against yourself for Sam, you are going against what you feel about yourself to please her, that's not right. You must find reasons to avoid her, tell her your parents have other things to do when she insist on your parents to drive. Or straight out tell her that you had rather not go. Enough of this will discourage her from wanting to bully or use you. Sometimes you just have to stand up for yourself for the other person to see that you are worth respecting.My friend ditched me for her boyfriend and people who aren't true friends. What should i do?
find another friend...somebosy who's really true and not fake.
It might just be because shes just excited she has a boyfriend if she doesn't pay attention at all to you anymore than why should you to her?
It is never easy to move on without closure. However, you must ask yourself if ';Sam'; has already moved on. With any relationship, there is always something brought to the table, and something taken away. It seems that while Sam expects for you to bring yourself, your time, and the use of your parents vehicle to the table, she has made a decision that she will only bring herself, and that is only when it is convenient for her.
If you love yourself, understand that not allowing someone to use you doesn't mean that you should be mean to them. Instead, understand that if all you are getting out of this relationship is a friendship of convenience, that is all you are obligated to bring in return.
Good luck, because it sounds as though Sam is a very selfish person. The reality is that when she realizes that she cannot ';persuade'; you to be her convenient friend anymore, she will probably show the ';real'; nasty side of her . I think that then it will be much easier to make a decision as to whether or not you want this type of ';friend'; in your life at all.
you need to try and sit down with her and talk about the way she has been acting. Try not to come of rude or mean though because then she wont want to talk to you. Tell her how you feel and see what she says. If you have to, give her an ultimatum. its eitha you or her boyfriend.
dont be a friend with someone u know isnt one. Find another. a TRUE friend
Boyfriend broke up with me because of my mood swings...says i should just get an abortion. Please advice!?
Well I am 4 months preggo and I have been very moody and emotional. Id say about 80% of these emotions are toward my boyfriend. I feel bad but sometimes I just can't help it because I am only 18 and haven't told my parents yet, but that is the least of my problems, my job cut my hours so I'm not making much money, and also I've been very buzy taking care of my grandma who was recently diagnosed with a lung disease. This is causing me less time to see my boyfriend which also is bothering him. The other day we got into a fight and yesterday I didn't want to talk to him at all (even though we work together) so I get a text message from him saying, ';If your not gonna talk to me at all let's just stop talking altogether, and stop everything.'; I didn't know what to think so I told him if your gonna be so immature and dumb to act like this I could raise the baby on my own. He then said it not that he can't handle the baby he just doesn't want to deal with me and that I need to get an abortion. There's no way I would go and kill my baby but he thinks he has a right to say if I should or shouldnt. I was so hurt and told him how I felt that I thought he'd be the last person to do this because we have been through so much together. He then said he's sorry and he needs to calm down and if I could talk to him in person, I said I didn't want to see him at all because I couldn't look at him the same anymore and if I took his apology he might just go and bail on me again. This morning he sent a FORWARD text to me of two monkeys and it says nothing can come between us, not even a banana. I feel like he is taking all of this so lightly like what he did to me had no effect and everythings ok. Should I take him back, because I'm just overreacting. Or is this a sign of his true colors and save my self another heart break in the future. Help me pleaseBoyfriend broke up with me because of my mood swings...says i should just get an abortion. Please advice!?
going for abortion is risk coz u life can get expired. so better ask experts.
regards and best wishes.........Boyfriend broke up with me because of my mood swings...says i should just get an abortion. Please advice!?
hunni ok what he said was bad!!!! but with moods and angry due to your body i can understand how he is alsomixed up and its new to him to so he wont know how to handle it so i can see how he said it.sounds like he done it out of angry! he is trying to sort things with you. so no this isnt his true colours.a mean you said bad things to him aswell.you can bring up a child yourself but the baby needs a dad.gd luck and try and relax x
He doesn't seem like the best guy after saying that but it couldve just been emotions. You do know him better than anyone on yahoo answers though.
hes an asshole! he should be supporting you right now, not telling you to have a abortion because you get a little snappy. when I was pregnant I told my partner that I hate him and he never helps me and I used to dry at least twice a day and he was always kind and supportive of me.
Abortion is not the right choice because you will never know what the child will be in future. Remember, children are gifts from God.
good question
You two sound like you're in high school. This is why you're supposed to grow up and get married before you have children.
I hope your parents will support you through this pregnancy, because it's obvious he's not going to.
going for abortion is risk coz u life can get expired. so better ask experts.
regards and best wishes.........Boyfriend broke up with me because of my mood swings...says i should just get an abortion. Please advice!?
hunni ok what he said was bad!!!! but with moods and angry due to your body i can understand how he is alsomixed up and its new to him to so he wont know how to handle it so i can see how he said it.sounds like he done it out of angry! he is trying to sort things with you. so no this isnt his true colours.a mean you said bad things to him aswell.you can bring up a child yourself but the baby needs a dad.gd luck and try and relax x
He doesn't seem like the best guy after saying that but it couldve just been emotions. You do know him better than anyone on yahoo answers though.
hes an asshole! he should be supporting you right now, not telling you to have a abortion because you get a little snappy. when I was pregnant I told my partner that I hate him and he never helps me and I used to dry at least twice a day and he was always kind and supportive of me.
Abortion is not the right choice because you will never know what the child will be in future. Remember, children are gifts from God.
good question
You two sound like you're in high school. This is why you're supposed to grow up and get married before you have children.
I hope your parents will support you through this pregnancy, because it's obvious he's not going to.
Boyfriend problems.......but this one is way more interesting.?
My boyfriend always argues with me, then after he tries to give me this talk about how he is sorry and he was right about so and so...... whatever thats not the problem.
the problem is in the past he has flirted with girls on myspace and he has talked sh!t about me to those girls too while we were dating.
he has even talked sh!t about me to one of his ex crushes.
when i am mad at him about something he will say something and i will make a smart remark about it usually relating to his past.
when i make a remark it is usually true too, but it makes him so mad he hits himself and even starts crying real tears! that is until i say i am sorry kiss him whatever.
i do that so he will stop acting how he is acting it works so far.
but what can i do to make him stop acting like a little kid???
It has gotten to where he has said that he thought Jessica Alba was hot hot in the past (which i can agree she is very beautiful).
well when i ask him if he still thinks she is hot or whatever he always denies it. starts giving me this guilt trip and slowly tries to make me look like the bad one.
i dont care that he thinks she is hot or not i just want him to tell the truth and not hide it, i had to squeeze it out of him tonight till he finally admitted he still thought that.
when we get in a fight he has gone as far as cutting himself, socking his self and even banging his head into the wall, also hyperventilating himself too.
i make smart remarks because it is the easiest way to get back at him for hurting me in the past.
what should i do to stop him from acting like a little kid?
all of your opinions on this situation are welcome. dont just say leave him it isnt that easy i need answers please!Boyfriend problems.......but this one is way more interesting.?
start ignoring him for a while like dont answer his phone calls and whenever you see him pretend you gotta go and just walk away if he runs after you puch him in the face and call him a fag!!Boyfriend problems.......but this one is way more interesting.?
walk away, you have your whole life to find someone else why waste your teenage years dealing with that. kick him to the curb and worry about how successful you want to be when you grow up, so he will be mad that he treated you like crap!!!!! There's always someone better!!!!!
1- That wasn't interesting
2- Don't fight over really stupid things like if Jessica Alba is hot
3- Don't date someone that self mutilates, because he might mutilate you instead
4- Myspace is a drama starter
5- Finish school then go to college and find someone more normal.
wow, your relationship sounds alot like mine. its really hard. its like the guy ALWAYS has to act like the 2 year old and be in control. you just need to tell him you're NOT his doormat and you're not gonna sit around like this forever. yeah it might piss him off but it'll give him something to think about.
make your the sh%26amp;t you hear is true.
if it's true, ask him why he did that to you.
if his reply isn't good im sorry to say this but break up with him.
you can't take care of him unless he changes.
The only problem I can see is that you haven't dumped this loser yet. He's clearly unstable and I'm sure you can do better. He needs professional help. You're 16 and aren't qualified to give it to him. Don't be a martyr.
my personal opinion is that u should try talkin to him about it. that probably isnt the easiest way but its the best way, if he doesnt try to help ur relationship (or at least try), u might want to try and break up with him
you need to take him to a doctor or a psychiatrist. It's not you, it's him. He needs serious help. %26amp; he may hate you for it now but he will thank you later. %26amp; youre relationship with him will improve greatly. good luck and be strong
not tryin to be mean, but get out before it turns into you getting hit, not him.
dont bring up stuff from the past that only makes it worst
dump him
he's shaping up to be quite the emotionally abusive one. i know it's not that easy, but you should get out while you still can.
so heidi and spencer. talk to him about itt!!
I'm sorry but he sounds like he is Way too immature for a relationship right now to the point of putting himself in danger. I'd break up with him until he can grow up. Sorry that's just my opinion Good Luck!
OMG I can't believe it. He is acting like a kid. He IS a kid and so are you. You will both grow up eventually.
do to him what he those to you.. he would see it hurts and stuff.. .
thats pretty cheezy situations you have got there girl.
holly cow your boy is a mess eh.
i mean, cutting himself and doing all those crazy things? :S
its totally fine with me if my man thinks some actress or a singer is hot. i mean its his opinion right, its not like he went and slept with them. its just he admires their body and beauty. its fine with me, cuz i like some hot guys as well. i love rob pattinson, it doesnt mean my guy should go and cut himself.
im sorry if im being rude, but just watch out from this guy.
ok he did a mistake in past, stop doing your smart remarks. thats not nice. guys can be stupid sometimes and say things they really dont mean, but if youre with him now ( means you forgave him) you shouldnt remind him about the past all the time.
but if he still keeps hurting you.. talk to him about it. make him see what he is making you feel like..
well, best of luck.
You're so young to be going through these problems and he is an idiot that needs help and fast. Child do u have a mother? or does his mom know he is like this? He's harming you more than you think he is and in the experiences that i know through family and friends, I think you should get away from him or you'll and up getting depression. He's not a good person and I hope u see that before its too late! u sound like a sweet girl and your so young dont date yet just learn from afar til ur ready...
I'm a 17 year old guy also. I have a word of advice. Unlike me and a few others, a large portion of 17 year old guys and people around that age will do that. We can be total idiots and ignorant fools. It's something you either have to ignore, look past, or be lucky enough to have someone lacking those... tasteless traits some of us have.
Anyways, self bashing my gender aside (heh), here is a short and simple answer to your problem - leave him. Hearing what your said and not hearing his side, I can't really say much else but that. He's not worth it. I know it's easier said than done, but some people need tough love. Perhaps a bit of space will teach him in his next relationship or if you were to get back together.
If you instead wish to give him more chances, perhaps talk to his parents. Perhaps get him to go to therapy. If he suddenly hits himself and cries with that... Unless you are exaggerating, he might need to get some professional help.
Most people I know of will talk of celebrities like that. Married or single. Dating or just together with someone.
And I repeat myself - it's easier said than done but if worse comes to worse, you need to leave him. Anyone of my friends I've talked to or people that I've listened to/read blogs on sometimes have the same problems - they feel that it's not easy to just leave the person - the reasons skyrocket - ';We've been together for so long';, or ';I'm close to his/her family';, or whatever. Whatever your reasons are there are probably an indefinite amount of ways to tackle them and go along as if there was no problem.
I hope this helps you somehow, and good luck.
oh girl this man is crazy he is a possible threat to you if you do break up. Seriously you need to tell him to stop acting like a baby or it is going to be over. you two are to young and he needs help he has anger problems. Be very cautious with this one good luck.
It sounds like there needs to be some major growing up to be done.I would and have ignored my other half when i had this problem.It totally drives him nuts.Seriously,when he makes the stupid remarks,just act like u didnt hear him,be the more mature one.Yes,its hard to ignore and not reply with a witty comeback but being ignored is a bummer.It will shock n confuse him so much he will eventually realize he is being a jerk n just quit....it wont happen overnight but it will happen.Jus be patient.He may even realize how immature hes being and decide to act like a big boy.Good luck!!!
hes very immature and you should just leave him alone. hes not for you fighting is too much and the distrust isn't worth it there are so many out there that are more grown up and really not nuts like he is.
Girl its hard to go about telling you how I honestly think you should do for him to stop acting like that. I dated a guy almost like how your boyfriend acts a few years ago but instead of hitting the wall he would hit me. Your man probably needs a one and one conversation with you without the smart remarks. Leave the questions about all these girls alone. He probably thinks you don't trust him the way he does with you thats why he goes crazy. It may not be you it can be the problems he has at his house which he's trying so hard to not keep it in.
well i was gonna say dont leave him because if he hurts himself when u fight i dont know what would happen if you left him, but then i read the end and see you already said that.
well i really dont know what to day because you cant change really how a person acts and if you talk to him about it it may turn into a fight. so maybe you could talk to him about it but slowly and gently. i know you probably were being patient but like maybe even more patient. or maybe he might have to see someone? i dont know. i am sorry he is hurting himself. i think he may also be a little over dramatic though.
I'd say stop the smart remarks. He's obviously very sorry for it. He sounds like a guy who likes to tease. Just stop the remarks
And I'm sorry hun but he's not acting like a little kid. He might have some problems he needs to get looked at by a doctor.
You want to get back at him for the past? It's in the past! LET IT GO! Once again sorry but you're sounding like a real B*tch right now. Just my personal opinion.
stop nagging him...what's the point in forcing him to say that jessica alba is hot? what's that supposed to solve? She is hot...now what. You encouraged a pointless argument. and from reading your story it seems like you do that alot. if you know that he will result with bringing harm to himself...why do you push him needlessly? you should be supporting him...finding him help to deal with his self harm issues. instead you pick at his insecurities and his past because you know that you can upset him that way. you aren't doing him any favors...all you are doing is trying to make him feel as bad as you do. the question you should be asking is how you can change your behavior to be a better friend, let alone girlfriend. not how to get him to stop acting like a little kid.
Hi. So, I was reading other peoples answers before answering myself and a lot of them are telling you to get out while you still can. I must say, I'll have to agree. I know you love him and you care about him, you wouldn't be with him if you didn't. But your both young, and if he's hurting himself in any way (which he is) you need to tell somebody. You need to tell his parents, one of his relatives, someone who can help him. Because cutting and hitting yourself isn't good. If you care about him, you'll tell someone. Or, at least tell him to stop hurting himself because in reality he's only hurting the people that he loves and love him.
Trust me. I have a BEST friend whose like a sister to me, and when I found out she was hurting herself I was crying. Because it hurts. What if he cuts himself to the point where he's in the hospital. What if he gets carried away? So, before you can help your relationship you need to help him first.
And don't leave him or break up with him just yet because he'll need you through all of it. Be there for him. Stop making smart remarks at him because it doesn't get you anywhere it only hurts him.
Most importantly, you should sit down and talk to each other. Tell him how you feel and make sure he tells you how he feels.
And also, I'm 19. I've been with my current boyfriend for 2 1/2 years. We've fought over stupid things like is Jessica Alba is hot or whatever, but in the end those things shouldn't matter. All it is is reassurance. So tell him, ';yeah, she's hot but don't you think I'm hotter.'; Haha! Seriously.
And the whole myspace thing- myspace causes a lot of drama. Trust me! Its caused some issues for my boyfriend and I. But you know what? Its just online flirting. It doesn't matter. It doesn't mean anything. So don't trip about it, alright?
Now, if this doesn't help... just let me know and I will try to use my personal experiences to help you out.
Good luck!
Veronica
He needs to see a christian counselor that believes in exorcism. You should also look into dis-associative identity disorder. God can help him I have experienced those kinds of problems with someone and I know God the Father of Jesus can help. God Bless.
Your boyfriends battle is a rough one and I can assure you He is maybe a compulsive liar. He is way afraid to lose you. He may be trying to control you and not want you to have other friends he has the potential for abuse. He has self hate issues and was probably emotionally and or physically abused at some time in his precious life. If you are still in school have him speak to the school counselor. God bless.
the problem is in the past he has flirted with girls on myspace and he has talked sh!t about me to those girls too while we were dating.
he has even talked sh!t about me to one of his ex crushes.
when i am mad at him about something he will say something and i will make a smart remark about it usually relating to his past.
when i make a remark it is usually true too, but it makes him so mad he hits himself and even starts crying real tears! that is until i say i am sorry kiss him whatever.
i do that so he will stop acting how he is acting it works so far.
but what can i do to make him stop acting like a little kid???
It has gotten to where he has said that he thought Jessica Alba was hot hot in the past (which i can agree she is very beautiful).
well when i ask him if he still thinks she is hot or whatever he always denies it. starts giving me this guilt trip and slowly tries to make me look like the bad one.
i dont care that he thinks she is hot or not i just want him to tell the truth and not hide it, i had to squeeze it out of him tonight till he finally admitted he still thought that.
when we get in a fight he has gone as far as cutting himself, socking his self and even banging his head into the wall, also hyperventilating himself too.
i make smart remarks because it is the easiest way to get back at him for hurting me in the past.
what should i do to stop him from acting like a little kid?
all of your opinions on this situation are welcome. dont just say leave him it isnt that easy i need answers please!Boyfriend problems.......but this one is way more interesting.?
start ignoring him for a while like dont answer his phone calls and whenever you see him pretend you gotta go and just walk away if he runs after you puch him in the face and call him a fag!!Boyfriend problems.......but this one is way more interesting.?
walk away, you have your whole life to find someone else why waste your teenage years dealing with that. kick him to the curb and worry about how successful you want to be when you grow up, so he will be mad that he treated you like crap!!!!! There's always someone better!!!!!
1- That wasn't interesting
2- Don't fight over really stupid things like if Jessica Alba is hot
3- Don't date someone that self mutilates, because he might mutilate you instead
4- Myspace is a drama starter
5- Finish school then go to college and find someone more normal.
wow, your relationship sounds alot like mine. its really hard. its like the guy ALWAYS has to act like the 2 year old and be in control. you just need to tell him you're NOT his doormat and you're not gonna sit around like this forever. yeah it might piss him off but it'll give him something to think about.
make your the sh%26amp;t you hear is true.
if it's true, ask him why he did that to you.
if his reply isn't good im sorry to say this but break up with him.
you can't take care of him unless he changes.
The only problem I can see is that you haven't dumped this loser yet. He's clearly unstable and I'm sure you can do better. He needs professional help. You're 16 and aren't qualified to give it to him. Don't be a martyr.
my personal opinion is that u should try talkin to him about it. that probably isnt the easiest way but its the best way, if he doesnt try to help ur relationship (or at least try), u might want to try and break up with him
you need to take him to a doctor or a psychiatrist. It's not you, it's him. He needs serious help. %26amp; he may hate you for it now but he will thank you later. %26amp; youre relationship with him will improve greatly. good luck and be strong
not tryin to be mean, but get out before it turns into you getting hit, not him.
dont bring up stuff from the past that only makes it worst
dump him
he's shaping up to be quite the emotionally abusive one. i know it's not that easy, but you should get out while you still can.
so heidi and spencer. talk to him about itt!!
I'm sorry but he sounds like he is Way too immature for a relationship right now to the point of putting himself in danger. I'd break up with him until he can grow up. Sorry that's just my opinion Good Luck!
OMG I can't believe it. He is acting like a kid. He IS a kid and so are you. You will both grow up eventually.
do to him what he those to you.. he would see it hurts and stuff.. .
thats pretty cheezy situations you have got there girl.
holly cow your boy is a mess eh.
i mean, cutting himself and doing all those crazy things? :S
its totally fine with me if my man thinks some actress or a singer is hot. i mean its his opinion right, its not like he went and slept with them. its just he admires their body and beauty. its fine with me, cuz i like some hot guys as well. i love rob pattinson, it doesnt mean my guy should go and cut himself.
im sorry if im being rude, but just watch out from this guy.
ok he did a mistake in past, stop doing your smart remarks. thats not nice. guys can be stupid sometimes and say things they really dont mean, but if youre with him now ( means you forgave him) you shouldnt remind him about the past all the time.
but if he still keeps hurting you.. talk to him about it. make him see what he is making you feel like..
well, best of luck.
You're so young to be going through these problems and he is an idiot that needs help and fast. Child do u have a mother? or does his mom know he is like this? He's harming you more than you think he is and in the experiences that i know through family and friends, I think you should get away from him or you'll and up getting depression. He's not a good person and I hope u see that before its too late! u sound like a sweet girl and your so young dont date yet just learn from afar til ur ready...
I'm a 17 year old guy also. I have a word of advice. Unlike me and a few others, a large portion of 17 year old guys and people around that age will do that. We can be total idiots and ignorant fools. It's something you either have to ignore, look past, or be lucky enough to have someone lacking those... tasteless traits some of us have.
Anyways, self bashing my gender aside (heh), here is a short and simple answer to your problem - leave him. Hearing what your said and not hearing his side, I can't really say much else but that. He's not worth it. I know it's easier said than done, but some people need tough love. Perhaps a bit of space will teach him in his next relationship or if you were to get back together.
If you instead wish to give him more chances, perhaps talk to his parents. Perhaps get him to go to therapy. If he suddenly hits himself and cries with that... Unless you are exaggerating, he might need to get some professional help.
Most people I know of will talk of celebrities like that. Married or single. Dating or just together with someone.
And I repeat myself - it's easier said than done but if worse comes to worse, you need to leave him. Anyone of my friends I've talked to or people that I've listened to/read blogs on sometimes have the same problems - they feel that it's not easy to just leave the person - the reasons skyrocket - ';We've been together for so long';, or ';I'm close to his/her family';, or whatever. Whatever your reasons are there are probably an indefinite amount of ways to tackle them and go along as if there was no problem.
I hope this helps you somehow, and good luck.
oh girl this man is crazy he is a possible threat to you if you do break up. Seriously you need to tell him to stop acting like a baby or it is going to be over. you two are to young and he needs help he has anger problems. Be very cautious with this one good luck.
It sounds like there needs to be some major growing up to be done.I would and have ignored my other half when i had this problem.It totally drives him nuts.Seriously,when he makes the stupid remarks,just act like u didnt hear him,be the more mature one.Yes,its hard to ignore and not reply with a witty comeback but being ignored is a bummer.It will shock n confuse him so much he will eventually realize he is being a jerk n just quit....it wont happen overnight but it will happen.Jus be patient.He may even realize how immature hes being and decide to act like a big boy.Good luck!!!
hes very immature and you should just leave him alone. hes not for you fighting is too much and the distrust isn't worth it there are so many out there that are more grown up and really not nuts like he is.
Girl its hard to go about telling you how I honestly think you should do for him to stop acting like that. I dated a guy almost like how your boyfriend acts a few years ago but instead of hitting the wall he would hit me. Your man probably needs a one and one conversation with you without the smart remarks. Leave the questions about all these girls alone. He probably thinks you don't trust him the way he does with you thats why he goes crazy. It may not be you it can be the problems he has at his house which he's trying so hard to not keep it in.
well i was gonna say dont leave him because if he hurts himself when u fight i dont know what would happen if you left him, but then i read the end and see you already said that.
well i really dont know what to day because you cant change really how a person acts and if you talk to him about it it may turn into a fight. so maybe you could talk to him about it but slowly and gently. i know you probably were being patient but like maybe even more patient. or maybe he might have to see someone? i dont know. i am sorry he is hurting himself. i think he may also be a little over dramatic though.
I'd say stop the smart remarks. He's obviously very sorry for it. He sounds like a guy who likes to tease. Just stop the remarks
And I'm sorry hun but he's not acting like a little kid. He might have some problems he needs to get looked at by a doctor.
You want to get back at him for the past? It's in the past! LET IT GO! Once again sorry but you're sounding like a real B*tch right now. Just my personal opinion.
stop nagging him...what's the point in forcing him to say that jessica alba is hot? what's that supposed to solve? She is hot...now what. You encouraged a pointless argument. and from reading your story it seems like you do that alot. if you know that he will result with bringing harm to himself...why do you push him needlessly? you should be supporting him...finding him help to deal with his self harm issues. instead you pick at his insecurities and his past because you know that you can upset him that way. you aren't doing him any favors...all you are doing is trying to make him feel as bad as you do. the question you should be asking is how you can change your behavior to be a better friend, let alone girlfriend. not how to get him to stop acting like a little kid.
Hi. So, I was reading other peoples answers before answering myself and a lot of them are telling you to get out while you still can. I must say, I'll have to agree. I know you love him and you care about him, you wouldn't be with him if you didn't. But your both young, and if he's hurting himself in any way (which he is) you need to tell somebody. You need to tell his parents, one of his relatives, someone who can help him. Because cutting and hitting yourself isn't good. If you care about him, you'll tell someone. Or, at least tell him to stop hurting himself because in reality he's only hurting the people that he loves and love him.
Trust me. I have a BEST friend whose like a sister to me, and when I found out she was hurting herself I was crying. Because it hurts. What if he cuts himself to the point where he's in the hospital. What if he gets carried away? So, before you can help your relationship you need to help him first.
And don't leave him or break up with him just yet because he'll need you through all of it. Be there for him. Stop making smart remarks at him because it doesn't get you anywhere it only hurts him.
Most importantly, you should sit down and talk to each other. Tell him how you feel and make sure he tells you how he feels.
And also, I'm 19. I've been with my current boyfriend for 2 1/2 years. We've fought over stupid things like is Jessica Alba is hot or whatever, but in the end those things shouldn't matter. All it is is reassurance. So tell him, ';yeah, she's hot but don't you think I'm hotter.'; Haha! Seriously.
And the whole myspace thing- myspace causes a lot of drama. Trust me! Its caused some issues for my boyfriend and I. But you know what? Its just online flirting. It doesn't matter. It doesn't mean anything. So don't trip about it, alright?
Now, if this doesn't help... just let me know and I will try to use my personal experiences to help you out.
Good luck!
Veronica
He needs to see a christian counselor that believes in exorcism. You should also look into dis-associative identity disorder. God can help him I have experienced those kinds of problems with someone and I know God the Father of Jesus can help. God Bless.
Your boyfriends battle is a rough one and I can assure you He is maybe a compulsive liar. He is way afraid to lose you. He may be trying to control you and not want you to have other friends he has the potential for abuse. He has self hate issues and was probably emotionally and or physically abused at some time in his precious life. If you are still in school have him speak to the school counselor. God bless.
URGENTLY NEED SOME HELP HERE!!!?
Ok so heres what happened!!!?
ok my one of my best friends has been dating this guy for about 5 months now, but she changed when she started dating him, she ignored all of her friends, started spending everyday with her boyfriend, and getting really jealous if anyone was around her boyfriend and would complain/worry that he would dump her if he found someone prettier. she told him within the 2 week of them dating that if in a year and they reevaluated themselves and they still really liked each other that she would give herself to him.she has become very protective over him and clings to him but he also follows her around like a lost puppy at lunch she no longer sits with her friends but sits alone with him at the table, she has lost all of her friends and im about to discontuine this friendship we've been friends for almost 6 years but this has gotten rediculous she doesnt talk to me and if i try to talk to her shes all over her boyfriend, making me very uncomfortable and ive told her this, yet she will contuine to kiss him and hang on him when im trying to talk to her, she would pull him out of classes just so they could be together and now she is trying to change him (somehow he is ok with all of this). but everytime ive tried to confront her about how shes neglecting her friends she gets really mad and lashes out at me, she will say things like your just not being supportive of me and my boyfriend, your just jealous because i have a loving boyfriend and i dont, or your not a good friend. ive told her many times im happy for her and boyfriend and ive even invited them to come to events with us but she refuses to bring him anywhere near her friends. (plus now her boyfriend has told her that hes going to marry her) %26gt;HES A Junior and shes a sopmore) everytime ive tried confronting her we get into fights each one getting worse then the last and it just keeps escalating im tired of all the drama, she use to be really fun, popular and nice but now shes really irritable, jealous and has no friends, shes become a frequent subject of negative gossip and sadly i agree with most of the things i hear about her.... i dont know what to do i want to contuine my friendship with her but lately all shes been doing is making my self confidence shrink..ive tried having girl only nights and they were fine except that she kept texting her boyfriend even when we asked her to stop, etc. then the other day she got mad at me for a misunderstanding about how she said she would sell me her ds well i sent her a txt saying hey i have the check written out i guess whenever you want to exchange it then ill bring it to school i got a txt back from her where she was screaming at me saying i was idiot and that she didnt say she was going to sell it i just replied well ok then i guess just never mind, (i figured she had a bad day) then later that day i asked if she ok and i got another crude reply: your stupid, good luck with your (insert my personal issue here) i always knew something was wrong with you. (she fired a comment back at me about a personal issue that i confided in her the night before) i sent back a message saying that was a low blow even for her and i didnt get a response but when i got on FB there was a message from her saying:I feel better now :) all of the fighting is finally OVER! Sometimes, ig it's best just to let things go, even if they were one of your best friends. I hope she reads this, and I hope one day she and I will be able to restart and make a new friendship, until that day comes, I'll enjoy the peace
and i know shes saying that to make me angry and seem like its my fault but she attacked me out of NOWHERE!
PLEASE HELP!! i dont now what to do.......URGENTLY NEED SOME HELP HERE!!!?
wow.... how boringURGENTLY NEED SOME HELP HERE!!!?
Sounds like you miss being with her and the good times you had together. Right now she just doesn't have enough time to go around so be patient and find other things and people as well as her to fill your time. Some day you may have a boyfriend that takes up all your time and you won't have time for her. Eventually you both will learn how to have a happy balance.
ok my one of my best friends has been dating this guy for about 5 months now, but she changed when she started dating him, she ignored all of her friends, started spending everyday with her boyfriend, and getting really jealous if anyone was around her boyfriend and would complain/worry that he would dump her if he found someone prettier. she told him within the 2 week of them dating that if in a year and they reevaluated themselves and they still really liked each other that she would give herself to him.she has become very protective over him and clings to him but he also follows her around like a lost puppy at lunch she no longer sits with her friends but sits alone with him at the table, she has lost all of her friends and im about to discontuine this friendship we've been friends for almost 6 years but this has gotten rediculous she doesnt talk to me and if i try to talk to her shes all over her boyfriend, making me very uncomfortable and ive told her this, yet she will contuine to kiss him and hang on him when im trying to talk to her, she would pull him out of classes just so they could be together and now she is trying to change him (somehow he is ok with all of this). but everytime ive tried to confront her about how shes neglecting her friends she gets really mad and lashes out at me, she will say things like your just not being supportive of me and my boyfriend, your just jealous because i have a loving boyfriend and i dont, or your not a good friend. ive told her many times im happy for her and boyfriend and ive even invited them to come to events with us but she refuses to bring him anywhere near her friends. (plus now her boyfriend has told her that hes going to marry her) %26gt;HES A Junior and shes a sopmore) everytime ive tried confronting her we get into fights each one getting worse then the last and it just keeps escalating im tired of all the drama, she use to be really fun, popular and nice but now shes really irritable, jealous and has no friends, shes become a frequent subject of negative gossip and sadly i agree with most of the things i hear about her.... i dont know what to do i want to contuine my friendship with her but lately all shes been doing is making my self confidence shrink..ive tried having girl only nights and they were fine except that she kept texting her boyfriend even when we asked her to stop, etc. then the other day she got mad at me for a misunderstanding about how she said she would sell me her ds well i sent her a txt saying hey i have the check written out i guess whenever you want to exchange it then ill bring it to school i got a txt back from her where she was screaming at me saying i was idiot and that she didnt say she was going to sell it i just replied well ok then i guess just never mind, (i figured she had a bad day) then later that day i asked if she ok and i got another crude reply: your stupid, good luck with your (insert my personal issue here) i always knew something was wrong with you. (she fired a comment back at me about a personal issue that i confided in her the night before) i sent back a message saying that was a low blow even for her and i didnt get a response but when i got on FB there was a message from her saying:I feel better now :) all of the fighting is finally OVER! Sometimes, ig it's best just to let things go, even if they were one of your best friends. I hope she reads this, and I hope one day she and I will be able to restart and make a new friendship, until that day comes, I'll enjoy the peace
and i know shes saying that to make me angry and seem like its my fault but she attacked me out of NOWHERE!
PLEASE HELP!! i dont now what to do.......URGENTLY NEED SOME HELP HERE!!!?
wow.... how boringURGENTLY NEED SOME HELP HERE!!!?
Sounds like you miss being with her and the good times you had together. Right now she just doesn't have enough time to go around so be patient and find other things and people as well as her to fill your time. Some day you may have a boyfriend that takes up all your time and you won't have time for her. Eventually you both will learn how to have a happy balance.
Ok so heres what happened!!!?
ok my one of my best friends has been dating this guy for about 5 months now, but she changed when she started dating him, she ignored all of her friends, started spending everyday with her boyfriend, and getting really jealous if anyone was around her boyfriend and would complain/worry that he would dump her if he found someone prettier. she told him within the 2 week of them dating that if in a year and they reevaluated themselves and they still really liked each other that she would give herself to him.she has become very protective over him and clings to him but he also follows her around like a lost puppy at lunch she no longer sits with her friends but sits alone with him at the table, she has lost all of her friends and im about to discontuine this friendship we've been friends for almost 6 years but this has gotten rediculous she doesnt talk to me and if i try to talk to her shes all over her boyfriend, making me very uncomfortable and ive told her this, yet she will contuine to kiss him and hang on him when im trying to talk to her, she would pull him out of classes just so they could be together and now she is trying to change him (somehow he is ok with all of this). but everytime ive tried to confront her about how shes neglecting her friends she gets really mad and lashes out at me, she will say things like your just not being supportive of me and my boyfriend, your just jealous because i have a loving boyfriend and i dont, or your not a good friend. ive told her many times im happy for her and boyfriend and ive even invited them to come to events with us but she refuses to bring him anywhere near her friends. (plus now her boyfriend has told her that hes going to marry her) %26gt;HES A Junior and shes a sopmore) everytime ive tried confronting her we get into fights each one getting worse then the last and it just keeps escalating im tired of all the drama, she use to be really fun, popular and nice but now shes really irritable, jealous and has no friends, shes become a frequent subject of negative gossip and sadly i agree with most of the things i hear about her.... i dont know what to do i want to contuine my friendship with her but lately all shes been doing is making my self confidence shrink..ive tried having girl only nights and they were fine except that she kept texting her boyfriend even when we asked her to stop, etc. then the other day she got mad at me for a misunderstanding about how she said she would sell me her ds well i sent her a txt saying hey i have the check written out i guess whenever you want to exchange it then ill bring it to school i got a txt back from her where she was screaming at me saying i was idiot and that she didnt say she was going to sell it i just replied well ok then i guess just never mind, (i figured she had a bad day) then later that day i asked if she ok and i got another crude reply: your stupid, good luck with your (insert my personal issue here) i always knew something was wrong with you. (she fired a comment back at me about a personal issue that i confided in her the night before) i sent back a message saying that was a low blow even for her and i didnt get a response but when i got on FB there was a message from her saying:I feel better now :) all of the fighting is finally OVER! Sometimes, ig it's best just to let things go, even if they were one of your best friends. I hope she reads this, and I hope one day she and I will be able to restart and make a new friendship, until that day comes, I'll enjoy the peace
and i know shes saying that to make me angry and seem like its my fault but she attacked me out of NOWHERE!
PLEASE HELP!! i dont now what to do.......Ok so heres what happened!!!?
I know you love your friend very much but you must let her go...if she comes back fine! You guys will be better friends than before! However, If she dose not come back then she never was your friend in the first place...so just let her go!!!.Ok so heres what happened!!!?
Just explain to her how you feel! and say that would never do that to her! ( calm down a little )
answer mine? http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?…
Oh I know how it feels. But the best thing do is get out of there. That friendship is toxic and as you said, your self-confidence is shrinking and no friend should do that to you. If she wants do ditch her friends for a guy, and won't listen to anything you say, the best thing to do is let her. I know its hard but you have other friends and they'll be there for you. Just wait until this guy dumps her, she'll ask to sit with you guys again and it'll all be back to normal. Good luck with waiting it out.
Viewing conflict in senior relationships, or any relationships, as an opportunity for growth can go against instinctive responses. When conflict arises, we often feel attacked. Our fight or flight response may be triggered. We think we must choose between passivity or defense. However, if you don’t personalize the problem (i.e. make it about you) then this level of reaction becomes unneeded. Instead, you can logically look at the situation, open to the other person’s input, and decide together what can be done to help make things better.
The quickest way to deal with conflict is to avoid blame or judgment. Simply explain your experience to your partner. Your goal is to share your emotions and worries, not to decide who is bad. Challenge yourself to not view your partner’s behavior as “wrong.” While it may be displeasing to you, this does not make one person right and the other one wrong. Furthermore, he/she is not responsible for your reaction. Your feelings are important and should be communicated in this way so your partner can hear you.
and i know shes saying that to make me angry and seem like its my fault but she attacked me out of NOWHERE!
PLEASE HELP!! i dont now what to do.......Ok so heres what happened!!!?
I know you love your friend very much but you must let her go...if she comes back fine! You guys will be better friends than before! However, If she dose not come back then she never was your friend in the first place...so just let her go!!!.Ok so heres what happened!!!?
Just explain to her how you feel! and say that would never do that to her! ( calm down a little )
answer mine? http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?…
Oh I know how it feels. But the best thing do is get out of there. That friendship is toxic and as you said, your self-confidence is shrinking and no friend should do that to you. If she wants do ditch her friends for a guy, and won't listen to anything you say, the best thing to do is let her. I know its hard but you have other friends and they'll be there for you. Just wait until this guy dumps her, she'll ask to sit with you guys again and it'll all be back to normal. Good luck with waiting it out.
Viewing conflict in senior relationships, or any relationships, as an opportunity for growth can go against instinctive responses. When conflict arises, we often feel attacked. Our fight or flight response may be triggered. We think we must choose between passivity or defense. However, if you don’t personalize the problem (i.e. make it about you) then this level of reaction becomes unneeded. Instead, you can logically look at the situation, open to the other person’s input, and decide together what can be done to help make things better.
The quickest way to deal with conflict is to avoid blame or judgment. Simply explain your experience to your partner. Your goal is to share your emotions and worries, not to decide who is bad. Challenge yourself to not view your partner’s behavior as “wrong.” While it may be displeasing to you, this does not make one person right and the other one wrong. Furthermore, he/she is not responsible for your reaction. Your feelings are important and should be communicated in this way so your partner can hear you.
What if my boyfriend doesn't want to take me to prom?
I have very strict parents. They almost never let me do anything and my boyfriend doesn't even think it's worth it for me to ask my parents if I can go to his prom (we go to different schools)
He said it would be so much easier if he just took his friend and went with his friends, and that kind of hurt. Then I got mad and asked him that it wouldn't hurt to ask and I got upset with him.
Then he went and said ';I know this is going to sound mean but this isn't your prom'; and he said that we fight so much anyways that he'd have more fun relaxing with his friends....and that just hurt so bad and I couldn't stop crying. He doesn't even know that he makes me cry sometimes. Now I don't even know what to say to him....
We've been dating for almost 2 years, and I my dream to go to his prom now is ruined. I don't even know what to say. I wish he realized how much he hurts me sometimes. This isn't the only thing that he does to hurt me. How can I show him without sounding stupid that he's hurting me really badly....?What if my boyfriend doesn't want to take me to prom?
Hello Kate, thanks for coming here hopefully the answers here can help you out some...
Now in my opinion you shouldn't think of yourself as sounding stupid in the first place. If you have been together for 2 years and he is making you cry on and off depending on something he does every now and then that's a pretty serious issue. Even though some people may think Prom is some type of a materlistic enjoyment and not necessary to feel ';loved'; by someone, I see where you're coming from and I understand how you're feeling. My advice to you is simply tell him exactly how you're feeling and what you've been going through since the time he hurt your feelings. You may feel like you're sounding stupid, but don't. Realize that he as your boyfriend needs to understand what he has done that has hurt you. This is all of course in my opinion, but if I were you I would tell him you need to talk to him and explain to him how you're feeling and I'm sure more than likely you'll come up with some sort of a compromise. There's always that chance he may not agree with you and choose to act rudely or uncaring towards your feelings, but if that's the case then you simply need to realize that is not your fault and you shouldn't guilt yourself for his behavior.
If he still feels it would be more easier for him to simply go to prom with his friends and you can live with that then all is solved. But I understand you feel it is a very special event to attend, and you would like to be there with your boyfriend. Just know that you should remain confident when it comes to telling someone you love how you feel, never feel anything that lowers your self esteem, you wouldn't be yourself if you were putting yourself down before you even talked to him!
I wish the best of luck to you Kate!What if my boyfriend doesn't want to take me to prom?
if that how he wants it to be. then let it be.
Ask your parents if you can go, and if someone ask you to be his date, then GO with him. Or if you don't want to hurt your bf, Go with your friends and HAVE FUN!!!
if you see him to the prom, don't spend the whole time with him, spend it with the ones you went to prom with, and if he gets mad, just tell him that ';YOU NEED TO RELAX, RIGHT?';
That's messed up! If he hurts you a lot then move on. Its not worth it. You will deal with that enough when you get older.
I would just tell him he hurt you and if he isn't going to make an effort to ask your parents then your taking another guy to your prom. If he has an issue, mockingly say it is what your parents would want anyways. I know it sounds childish-but so does he.
Very simple. Refuse to talk to him. Don't take his calls, don't reply to his messages, just freeze him out.
In fact, if you send him one message to say that you think he should make not seeing you permanent, seeing as he doesn't care how he makes you feel, then not talk to him at all, this would be good.
Other fish, dear, other fish .....
uh oh. looks like this relationship is headed for the worse. but i understand what ya mean. sure it's gonna hurt. if he ain't gonna even try to ask then you should be with someone else. oh sure two years is a long time but if he doesn't want to show you off then phooey on him! dump his A$$ and find someone better.
I'm sorry, but your boyfriend is a complete asshole. Show him this. And show him my response. I don't know either of you and cannot be biased toward you, so coming from an outside source, maybe it'll get through his thick head. I've been with my fiance for six years and he has never treated me this way. You ought to find a guy who will treat you right and dump this p.o.s.
Tell him how you feel. His reaction will tell you whether this relationship is going to go any further, although I think that you already know where it's heading. If someone keeps hurting you .. then that someone isn't the love of your life.
Go and talk to him. Tell him that he is really making u cry.
This would cool u down.
I had a Japanese girl friend but she was studying in a different school in Japan, it was a girl's school. Later she changed the school to join me!
Total jerk behavior. Is he ashamed of you or something? I'd be heated and I would probably dump his sorry butt.
You should be his number 1 priority. Don't take him to yours just to prove a point.
Maybe, he is going with someone else... I think you should break up with him so that your crying will stop...
good luck ;-)
dam your man is an asshol* and for him to say sum dumb stuff like that means he doesnt deserve you at all,dump that sucka you need better and can do better! = ) call me
Looks like a relationship is coming to an end.
Do to him what he did to you.
Douche...
Tell him how you feel. If he doesn't listen then he's even more of the above...
go to your prom with someone else. I would be pissed too.
i think its over with you 2 .good luck you got your prom .
Don't take the role of the victim ever in your life dear.
You know everything happens to you is your responsibility.
If he hurts you, why you keep on crying and being a victim when he's chilling and having fun with his other friends.
You can have fun with your friends too. Don't take things in life so seriously and deeply.
Your family cares about you and they want to protect you. Later you'll be thanking them.
Remember yourself value, your beauty and self respect. Go and have fun. Find someone that respects you and that you can communicate and understand each other...
Good Luck
Wow he's a freaking jerk. Dump that loser. He's treating you like you aren't very important to him and he couldn't care less what YOU want or what would make you happy. If he doesn't think you are worth the trouble to go to his prom, then dump his sorry a**! He actually told you that he'd rather take another girl and hang out with his friends? Seriously, he doesn't care about you and you need to retain some of your dignity and break up with him. He's a waste of time, really. I know it's hard after two years, but honestly, no girl deserves to be disrespected in that way. You could find someone better REAL easily. You certainly deserve better.
Why don't you ask your parent's if you can go? Why does it have to be him? If your parent's say yes then tell him you can go. There are a lot of wild partying that goes with these proms. Your parent's care so much for you they are looking out for your well being. That is so good. I respect parent's like that. Guys now days don't have much respect for girls. They use them for their own gratification and don't care who they hurt. If your boy friend won't ask and you won't ask. Just don't worry about it all, Maybe you have the wrong boy friend if he is so insensitive to your feelings. Try dating some others and let his sweat for awhile.
I think you need to take a step back and look at your relationship with this boy.
It sounds as if he's trying to hint to you that he doesn't want to go with you to his prom. Now what kind of boyfriend does that?
In my opinion, and I'm an outside source so I'm un biased, it seems that he's not treating you right or trying to make you happy. Thats not a very good boyfriend.
Talk to him, CALMLY, and tell him how this whole prom situation is making you feel. If he listens and tries to make it better then thats fantastic. If not, I think you guys need to sit down and talk. You don't have to break it off with him but if you, or both of you, are unhappy then I think you should.
Sweety, what are u doing with him?? ..
i bet you anythin if you break up with him, he won't care much, and if he doesn't want you why should u want him.obvioulsy after 2 yrs the flame has ';died out'; and if he was really into you ..he would WANT u to go to his prom, now, he doesnt that mean he'd rather be with his friend..dude its freakin prom!! ..u go with ur sweetheart! ..
that's mean.. i say u find a guy friend and go to their prom with them..just bcus.. and its obvious he takes u for granted...and u shouldnt cry for someone that sounds like a douch bag ..
ok? ...so don't cry, go to another friend's prom, and break up with him.
understand this,,it may not be that he is mean.. it might be that he is young and wants to have fun..he is in a different place [emonally] than u are.
Aw that sounds very jerkish of him to do that.
If you've been going out with him for so long I think you should be able to talk to him openly about this. Tell him that he hurts you sometimes with the things he says or does...
Tell him that even if it would be a bit of a struggle for you to be able to go to his prom , it would be worth it cause you love each other right?
He needs to understand your feelings and if you are closing them off then he won't get a chance to. Let him know what's going on and I hope you guys get through this. Best of luck to you dear.
your bf shouldnt have done that...just have a one to one sit down and TALK....i knoo it sounds like the most obv thing...but if things arent working out between you two and he makes you upset he needs to know!! he needs to know what hes doing wrong so he can change...and if he doesnt then he isnt worth it anyway =) but dont worry....you have been together for 2 years...i have strict parents too...but its as if your bf is using that as an excuse...soo say to him...we have been together 2 years and one of the days in your life that u will remember you dont want to spend it with me?! ....and don't be afraid to get emotional infront of him..he needs to know what hes doing to you...hopefully when he sees you like that he will understand and be comforting...but if he doesnt then seriously u can do better girl =)
He said it would be so much easier if he just took his friend and went with his friends, and that kind of hurt. Then I got mad and asked him that it wouldn't hurt to ask and I got upset with him.
Then he went and said ';I know this is going to sound mean but this isn't your prom'; and he said that we fight so much anyways that he'd have more fun relaxing with his friends....and that just hurt so bad and I couldn't stop crying. He doesn't even know that he makes me cry sometimes. Now I don't even know what to say to him....
We've been dating for almost 2 years, and I my dream to go to his prom now is ruined. I don't even know what to say. I wish he realized how much he hurts me sometimes. This isn't the only thing that he does to hurt me. How can I show him without sounding stupid that he's hurting me really badly....?What if my boyfriend doesn't want to take me to prom?
Hello Kate, thanks for coming here hopefully the answers here can help you out some...
Now in my opinion you shouldn't think of yourself as sounding stupid in the first place. If you have been together for 2 years and he is making you cry on and off depending on something he does every now and then that's a pretty serious issue. Even though some people may think Prom is some type of a materlistic enjoyment and not necessary to feel ';loved'; by someone, I see where you're coming from and I understand how you're feeling. My advice to you is simply tell him exactly how you're feeling and what you've been going through since the time he hurt your feelings. You may feel like you're sounding stupid, but don't. Realize that he as your boyfriend needs to understand what he has done that has hurt you. This is all of course in my opinion, but if I were you I would tell him you need to talk to him and explain to him how you're feeling and I'm sure more than likely you'll come up with some sort of a compromise. There's always that chance he may not agree with you and choose to act rudely or uncaring towards your feelings, but if that's the case then you simply need to realize that is not your fault and you shouldn't guilt yourself for his behavior.
If he still feels it would be more easier for him to simply go to prom with his friends and you can live with that then all is solved. But I understand you feel it is a very special event to attend, and you would like to be there with your boyfriend. Just know that you should remain confident when it comes to telling someone you love how you feel, never feel anything that lowers your self esteem, you wouldn't be yourself if you were putting yourself down before you even talked to him!
I wish the best of luck to you Kate!What if my boyfriend doesn't want to take me to prom?
if that how he wants it to be. then let it be.
Ask your parents if you can go, and if someone ask you to be his date, then GO with him. Or if you don't want to hurt your bf, Go with your friends and HAVE FUN!!!
if you see him to the prom, don't spend the whole time with him, spend it with the ones you went to prom with, and if he gets mad, just tell him that ';YOU NEED TO RELAX, RIGHT?';
That's messed up! If he hurts you a lot then move on. Its not worth it. You will deal with that enough when you get older.
I would just tell him he hurt you and if he isn't going to make an effort to ask your parents then your taking another guy to your prom. If he has an issue, mockingly say it is what your parents would want anyways. I know it sounds childish-but so does he.
Very simple. Refuse to talk to him. Don't take his calls, don't reply to his messages, just freeze him out.
In fact, if you send him one message to say that you think he should make not seeing you permanent, seeing as he doesn't care how he makes you feel, then not talk to him at all, this would be good.
Other fish, dear, other fish .....
uh oh. looks like this relationship is headed for the worse. but i understand what ya mean. sure it's gonna hurt. if he ain't gonna even try to ask then you should be with someone else. oh sure two years is a long time but if he doesn't want to show you off then phooey on him! dump his A$$ and find someone better.
I'm sorry, but your boyfriend is a complete asshole. Show him this. And show him my response. I don't know either of you and cannot be biased toward you, so coming from an outside source, maybe it'll get through his thick head. I've been with my fiance for six years and he has never treated me this way. You ought to find a guy who will treat you right and dump this p.o.s.
Tell him how you feel. His reaction will tell you whether this relationship is going to go any further, although I think that you already know where it's heading. If someone keeps hurting you .. then that someone isn't the love of your life.
Go and talk to him. Tell him that he is really making u cry.
This would cool u down.
I had a Japanese girl friend but she was studying in a different school in Japan, it was a girl's school. Later she changed the school to join me!
Total jerk behavior. Is he ashamed of you or something? I'd be heated and I would probably dump his sorry butt.
You should be his number 1 priority. Don't take him to yours just to prove a point.
Maybe, he is going with someone else... I think you should break up with him so that your crying will stop...
good luck ;-)
dam your man is an asshol* and for him to say sum dumb stuff like that means he doesnt deserve you at all,dump that sucka you need better and can do better! = ) call me
Looks like a relationship is coming to an end.
Do to him what he did to you.
Douche...
Tell him how you feel. If he doesn't listen then he's even more of the above...
go to your prom with someone else. I would be pissed too.
i think its over with you 2 .good luck you got your prom .
Don't take the role of the victim ever in your life dear.
You know everything happens to you is your responsibility.
If he hurts you, why you keep on crying and being a victim when he's chilling and having fun with his other friends.
You can have fun with your friends too. Don't take things in life so seriously and deeply.
Your family cares about you and they want to protect you. Later you'll be thanking them.
Remember yourself value, your beauty and self respect. Go and have fun. Find someone that respects you and that you can communicate and understand each other...
Good Luck
Wow he's a freaking jerk. Dump that loser. He's treating you like you aren't very important to him and he couldn't care less what YOU want or what would make you happy. If he doesn't think you are worth the trouble to go to his prom, then dump his sorry a**! He actually told you that he'd rather take another girl and hang out with his friends? Seriously, he doesn't care about you and you need to retain some of your dignity and break up with him. He's a waste of time, really. I know it's hard after two years, but honestly, no girl deserves to be disrespected in that way. You could find someone better REAL easily. You certainly deserve better.
Why don't you ask your parent's if you can go? Why does it have to be him? If your parent's say yes then tell him you can go. There are a lot of wild partying that goes with these proms. Your parent's care so much for you they are looking out for your well being. That is so good. I respect parent's like that. Guys now days don't have much respect for girls. They use them for their own gratification and don't care who they hurt. If your boy friend won't ask and you won't ask. Just don't worry about it all, Maybe you have the wrong boy friend if he is so insensitive to your feelings. Try dating some others and let his sweat for awhile.
I think you need to take a step back and look at your relationship with this boy.
It sounds as if he's trying to hint to you that he doesn't want to go with you to his prom. Now what kind of boyfriend does that?
In my opinion, and I'm an outside source so I'm un biased, it seems that he's not treating you right or trying to make you happy. Thats not a very good boyfriend.
Talk to him, CALMLY, and tell him how this whole prom situation is making you feel. If he listens and tries to make it better then thats fantastic. If not, I think you guys need to sit down and talk. You don't have to break it off with him but if you, or both of you, are unhappy then I think you should.
Sweety, what are u doing with him?? ..
i bet you anythin if you break up with him, he won't care much, and if he doesn't want you why should u want him.obvioulsy after 2 yrs the flame has ';died out'; and if he was really into you ..he would WANT u to go to his prom, now, he doesnt that mean he'd rather be with his friend..dude its freakin prom!! ..u go with ur sweetheart! ..
that's mean.. i say u find a guy friend and go to their prom with them..just bcus.. and its obvious he takes u for granted...and u shouldnt cry for someone that sounds like a douch bag ..
ok? ...so don't cry, go to another friend's prom, and break up with him.
understand this,,it may not be that he is mean.. it might be that he is young and wants to have fun..he is in a different place [emonally] than u are.
Aw that sounds very jerkish of him to do that.
If you've been going out with him for so long I think you should be able to talk to him openly about this. Tell him that he hurts you sometimes with the things he says or does...
Tell him that even if it would be a bit of a struggle for you to be able to go to his prom , it would be worth it cause you love each other right?
He needs to understand your feelings and if you are closing them off then he won't get a chance to. Let him know what's going on and I hope you guys get through this. Best of luck to you dear.
your bf shouldnt have done that...just have a one to one sit down and TALK....i knoo it sounds like the most obv thing...but if things arent working out between you two and he makes you upset he needs to know!! he needs to know what hes doing wrong so he can change...and if he doesnt then he isnt worth it anyway =) but dont worry....you have been together for 2 years...i have strict parents too...but its as if your bf is using that as an excuse...soo say to him...we have been together 2 years and one of the days in your life that u will remember you dont want to spend it with me?! ....and don't be afraid to get emotional infront of him..he needs to know what hes doing to you...hopefully when he sees you like that he will understand and be comforting...but if he doesnt then seriously u can do better girl =)
I know this is going to cause a fight with me and my boyfriend but..?
how do i stop it?
this is what happend
he got called into work early this morning, so i told him to call me when he knew when he was getting out. well 5 hours passed and i hadnt heard a thing. so i called his work, (bad idea) he always gets yelled at when i call. and he was like idk, its been a very busy day, but you just got me in trouble. so i hung up. a few mins later he called me back, and was like dont ******* call my work, and dont ******* hang up on me either. and i was like i dont want to sit around and wait for you to call me. and he was like well your going to have to wait. and hung up.
i know i was in the wrong for calling his work, he tells me all the time not to.
so when he gets home, how do i make this okay, and not such a big fight?I know this is going to cause a fight with me and my boyfriend but..?
There really isnt much you can do to lessen the degree of the fight. You could have prevented it by listining to him and respecting his wishes regarding not calling him at work. You cant control your boyfriend (making him call you on his work breaks, or lesson how angry he'll be when he gets home) you can only control yourself. So if he comes in the door and you seriously apologize then thats all you can do to lesson the blows. I imagine that you have been through this before because why else would he tell you not to call him at work? He sounded like he was really annoyed by you calling him, and like I said you need to respect his wishes.I know this is going to cause a fight with me and my boyfriend but..?
well you love him right? well you were worried and thats all u have to tell him
say sorrrrrryyyyyyyy....it was ur fault after all !
SIMPLE!!!!!!! just apologize.....tell him you were wrong and you won't do it again, only if it an emergency. obviously the calls to and from the office is a big problem for the company so just don't do it...wait for him to call you! or send texts to his cell phone.
Tell him you miss him. But the real question is that if you KNOW it gets him in trouble and you KNOW he's not sure when he will get off, why do you ask? Is he allowed to get text messages?
Well, he shouldn't have cursed at you.
I would just let him know that it upset you that he didn't do what he said he would.
He is in the wrong here.
When he gets home tell him you're sorry for getting him in trouble, but he hurt your feelings.
Well, I know you feel like you've been waiting around on him all day. Which is no fun. I've been in the same situation as you. But you also know NOT to call him at work.
It wasn't cool of him to call you back and talk to you that way-- but I'm sure it's because he got in trouble for you calling his workplace just to find out when he would be home. Especially since it was a busy day.
If I were you, I would just apologize for calling. Don't waste any time arguing about the situation because theres really nothing to argue about. He couldn't help the fact that worked called him in and it was very busy. It sucks waiting around for people, but I mean, he was at work. He has responsibilities there. It would be different if he was wasting time somewhere and ignoring you. Just let him know that you were sorry if you caused any trouble by calling...you just missed him and wanted to see him.
Maybe since he's been working all day and you've been chillin at home, you could have a little surprise for him when he gets off work? That way it'll make it harder for him to stay mad. Haha...cook him dinner or something like that. Buy him his fave candy or something he really enjoys. Like I said, there's no sense in arguing over it. Might as well kiss and make up.
oh boy. uh try to calm him down. procostinate on this subject and keep him talking on other things. by the time your sleeping he would have probably forgotten. hopefully.
eh just let it go, you know, just have dinner ready and avoid the subject, doesn't seem worth fighting over
wow ur a real bug a boo it sounds like your a very insecure person like your man is cheating if you dont know where he is and what he is doing and when he is doing it. not saying that u couldnt b worried about him.sad to say men hate that well at least you realize that u calling was a bad idea but if u 2 live 2gether then imost likely he is tired and would wanna rest or could b hungry so try to cook 4 him his favorite food dnt apologize yet wait for the right time run him a hot bath just let him relax when he get home just cater to him and let him know that u was just worried even though u thought he was gettin busy wit some hot chick. This is if he doesnt get fired cuz of u....
ok 1. unless you want thim to get fired do not call him at work anymore got it 2. do not call him at work unless its a terrable emergancy ok? 3.when he does get home tell him how stupid you were and you will never ever call him at work again. and take him in the bedroom and make it up to him. and 4. don't call him at work anymore
honey it's sooooo easy:
-large smile.
-warm kiss.
-nice dress.
-romantic dinner.
-lovely candles.
-and u know what next...................
lock the door XD
for ehrn he gets home have a nice dinner waiting for you. If he dont bring up you calling then you dont either. and if he does apologize. if you knew he would get in trouble why did you do it? it wouldn't kill you to wait and if you are daring you can also be wearing something nice for when he gets home and smell good. In the future dont call him for a silly reason like when are you getting off because i dont want to be waiting . Just think about how he will react or what will happen if you do call.
When he comes home be your normal self and IF he brings it up just apologize. If he goes on about it then let him and tell him you understand and that you were wrong.
If you want to minimize things as much as possible then this is what you should do.
the best thing you can do is never call his work again and wait for him too call you sometime during the day and goo about your normal routine during the day if he wants too get a hold of you he will (cellphone) or somehow. but for now i would maybe make him a nice dinner lower the lights put candles on some nice music. sense he said hes had a hard day at work have him relax, take a shower, or jacuzzi if you have one,take out the massage oil and lotions and treat your man too a good night of relaxation, but be prepared it might get him in the mood. best of luck and dont forget too appologize at the right moment though
this is what happend
he got called into work early this morning, so i told him to call me when he knew when he was getting out. well 5 hours passed and i hadnt heard a thing. so i called his work, (bad idea) he always gets yelled at when i call. and he was like idk, its been a very busy day, but you just got me in trouble. so i hung up. a few mins later he called me back, and was like dont ******* call my work, and dont ******* hang up on me either. and i was like i dont want to sit around and wait for you to call me. and he was like well your going to have to wait. and hung up.
i know i was in the wrong for calling his work, he tells me all the time not to.
so when he gets home, how do i make this okay, and not such a big fight?I know this is going to cause a fight with me and my boyfriend but..?
There really isnt much you can do to lessen the degree of the fight. You could have prevented it by listining to him and respecting his wishes regarding not calling him at work. You cant control your boyfriend (making him call you on his work breaks, or lesson how angry he'll be when he gets home) you can only control yourself. So if he comes in the door and you seriously apologize then thats all you can do to lesson the blows. I imagine that you have been through this before because why else would he tell you not to call him at work? He sounded like he was really annoyed by you calling him, and like I said you need to respect his wishes.I know this is going to cause a fight with me and my boyfriend but..?
well you love him right? well you were worried and thats all u have to tell him
say sorrrrrryyyyyyyy....it was ur fault after all !
SIMPLE!!!!!!! just apologize.....tell him you were wrong and you won't do it again, only if it an emergency. obviously the calls to and from the office is a big problem for the company so just don't do it...wait for him to call you! or send texts to his cell phone.
Tell him you miss him. But the real question is that if you KNOW it gets him in trouble and you KNOW he's not sure when he will get off, why do you ask? Is he allowed to get text messages?
Well, he shouldn't have cursed at you.
I would just let him know that it upset you that he didn't do what he said he would.
He is in the wrong here.
When he gets home tell him you're sorry for getting him in trouble, but he hurt your feelings.
Well, I know you feel like you've been waiting around on him all day. Which is no fun. I've been in the same situation as you. But you also know NOT to call him at work.
It wasn't cool of him to call you back and talk to you that way-- but I'm sure it's because he got in trouble for you calling his workplace just to find out when he would be home. Especially since it was a busy day.
If I were you, I would just apologize for calling. Don't waste any time arguing about the situation because theres really nothing to argue about. He couldn't help the fact that worked called him in and it was very busy. It sucks waiting around for people, but I mean, he was at work. He has responsibilities there. It would be different if he was wasting time somewhere and ignoring you. Just let him know that you were sorry if you caused any trouble by calling...you just missed him and wanted to see him.
Maybe since he's been working all day and you've been chillin at home, you could have a little surprise for him when he gets off work? That way it'll make it harder for him to stay mad. Haha...cook him dinner or something like that. Buy him his fave candy or something he really enjoys. Like I said, there's no sense in arguing over it. Might as well kiss and make up.
oh boy. uh try to calm him down. procostinate on this subject and keep him talking on other things. by the time your sleeping he would have probably forgotten. hopefully.
eh just let it go, you know, just have dinner ready and avoid the subject, doesn't seem worth fighting over
wow ur a real bug a boo it sounds like your a very insecure person like your man is cheating if you dont know where he is and what he is doing and when he is doing it. not saying that u couldnt b worried about him.sad to say men hate that well at least you realize that u calling was a bad idea but if u 2 live 2gether then imost likely he is tired and would wanna rest or could b hungry so try to cook 4 him his favorite food dnt apologize yet wait for the right time run him a hot bath just let him relax when he get home just cater to him and let him know that u was just worried even though u thought he was gettin busy wit some hot chick. This is if he doesnt get fired cuz of u....
ok 1. unless you want thim to get fired do not call him at work anymore got it 2. do not call him at work unless its a terrable emergancy ok? 3.when he does get home tell him how stupid you were and you will never ever call him at work again. and take him in the bedroom and make it up to him. and 4. don't call him at work anymore
honey it's sooooo easy:
-large smile.
-warm kiss.
-nice dress.
-romantic dinner.
-lovely candles.
-and u know what next...................
lock the door XD
for ehrn he gets home have a nice dinner waiting for you. If he dont bring up you calling then you dont either. and if he does apologize. if you knew he would get in trouble why did you do it? it wouldn't kill you to wait and if you are daring you can also be wearing something nice for when he gets home and smell good. In the future dont call him for a silly reason like when are you getting off because i dont want to be waiting . Just think about how he will react or what will happen if you do call.
When he comes home be your normal self and IF he brings it up just apologize. If he goes on about it then let him and tell him you understand and that you were wrong.
If you want to minimize things as much as possible then this is what you should do.
the best thing you can do is never call his work again and wait for him too call you sometime during the day and goo about your normal routine during the day if he wants too get a hold of you he will (cellphone) or somehow. but for now i would maybe make him a nice dinner lower the lights put candles on some nice music. sense he said hes had a hard day at work have him relax, take a shower, or jacuzzi if you have one,take out the massage oil and lotions and treat your man too a good night of relaxation, but be prepared it might get him in the mood. best of luck and dont forget too appologize at the right moment though
My boyfriend said really hurtful things to me help!?
we got in a fight because he saw a picture of my ex boyfriend on my phone naked. i just never got to delete it, and we were just arguing back and forth and he was saying that i make myself look so easy which is why he wanted to date me so he can get some but he fell in love with my personality and then he was like i can't even believe i'm going out with a kid (he's 22, i'm 17) i just thought you were hot, but i should've thought about how big your vagina is because you're so damn easy. and then he was like that's why your father abused you and every guy you've been with has cheated on you, you're a lying disgusting whore. i slapped the **** out of him and walked out, but i'm so hurt. i couldn't even see straight when i was driving to stay at my grandparents house because i refuse to stay at his apartment anymore. i was crying so hard, and i can't stop. just because i'm sexual and i like doing sexual things, and i'm pretty and i get a lot of guys that makes me a whore? i don't understand. we haven't broken up, but should i break up with him? my boyfriend thinks i'm a whore, is he just in it to have sex?My boyfriend said really hurtful things to me help!?
He probably was hurt, so when someone is hurt they say things to hurt you and break you down. It is emotional abuse and if you talk to him and he says it was your fault or he doesn't apologize to you then you shouldn't be with him anymore. Although if it was me I would of just left him. He was pissed off but I think he was saying a little too much, there is hurting someone feelings and then there is just overdoing it. And from going from dating a kid, to being abused by your father, to your pass relationships. He was just trying to say anything and is using your past against you.My boyfriend said really hurtful things to me help!?
guys always say things they dont mean ; if you guys are really in love who cares what you guys say to ech other its just words; i mean did you have more happy times or bad times ? just think about things and see how everything is; if your willing to stay with him then you should ; its up to you
Hes Prolly Just Upset.
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You're not a whore.
But you should leave him, even if he does apologize. You don't deserve that.
OMG dump that JERK!
obvious :( hes not a really decent guy
when ppl r mad they say what they are probably really thinking
he has fallen in love wid ur personality but then went to say all this other stuff which expalins why he wants to be with u/hy he even wanted u but to openly call u a cheap whore and make reference to the size of ur $%%26amp;*^^ is really unacceptable
i think its best to leave him coz he doesnt have any respect for u and thats degrading for sum1 to think about u in that way
just from now on try to be a more decent girl (proper, dont give ppl the wrong impression) and then ppl wont think about u in that way otherwise ul keep getting cheated on and disrespected...goshh i wudnt know what 2 do if that ever happened to me!! so ur quite a strong person :( :(
Look, you have to learn this sooner or later.
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR ACTIONS
Now, I don't know you. I have no clue if you are so sexually open as he said, but the image that you give will be what people see. Even if you are a saint you can't go off giving it to whoever comes around and think that no one has any right to think what they want.
What he said was hurtful, no doubt. He just said those things to get back at you because of what happened (Plus, he's your BF and find a naked guys pic in your phone, REALLY? You wouldn't be mad if that happened to you? Come on). Be responsible, be wise. You like sex? Fine! But be responsible about it. **** I like chocolate, but if my *** ate that all day I'd have diabetes and die by 30.
He probably was hurt, so when someone is hurt they say things to hurt you and break you down. It is emotional abuse and if you talk to him and he says it was your fault or he doesn't apologize to you then you shouldn't be with him anymore. Although if it was me I would of just left him. He was pissed off but I think he was saying a little too much, there is hurting someone feelings and then there is just overdoing it. And from going from dating a kid, to being abused by your father, to your pass relationships. He was just trying to say anything and is using your past against you.My boyfriend said really hurtful things to me help!?
guys always say things they dont mean ; if you guys are really in love who cares what you guys say to ech other its just words; i mean did you have more happy times or bad times ? just think about things and see how everything is; if your willing to stay with him then you should ; its up to you
Hes Prolly Just Upset.
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You're not a whore.
But you should leave him, even if he does apologize. You don't deserve that.
OMG dump that JERK!
obvious :( hes not a really decent guy
when ppl r mad they say what they are probably really thinking
he has fallen in love wid ur personality but then went to say all this other stuff which expalins why he wants to be with u/hy he even wanted u but to openly call u a cheap whore and make reference to the size of ur $%%26amp;*^^ is really unacceptable
i think its best to leave him coz he doesnt have any respect for u and thats degrading for sum1 to think about u in that way
just from now on try to be a more decent girl (proper, dont give ppl the wrong impression) and then ppl wont think about u in that way otherwise ul keep getting cheated on and disrespected...goshh i wudnt know what 2 do if that ever happened to me!! so ur quite a strong person :( :(
Look, you have to learn this sooner or later.
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR ACTIONS
Now, I don't know you. I have no clue if you are so sexually open as he said, but the image that you give will be what people see. Even if you are a saint you can't go off giving it to whoever comes around and think that no one has any right to think what they want.
What he said was hurtful, no doubt. He just said those things to get back at you because of what happened (Plus, he's your BF and find a naked guys pic in your phone, REALLY? You wouldn't be mad if that happened to you? Come on). Be responsible, be wise. You like sex? Fine! But be responsible about it. **** I like chocolate, but if my *** ate that all day I'd have diabetes and die by 30.
Please help! i want the abuse to stop?!!?
my boyfriend and I fight a lot. in my mind, he manipulates things and has to get the last word in the argument, no matter what the cost.
because he has to get the last word in, he has ended up saying some pretty cruel things to me in the past. He has called me several nasty names (terms you should NEVER call a woman) and on 3 occasions he has made the comment about how he is trying to push me away, get me to leave him, or how the relationship was all a joke, he was just playin
everytime he comes back and apologizes, saying he just said those in anger.
How would you deal with your sig. other telling you the relationship was a joke? even if it is in anger, still hurts
does he mean it or is he just trying to hurt me?
anyhow i am loosing ALL Desire to be intimate with him, as you can imagine. how do we bring the passion back%26gt;Please help! i want the abuse to stop?!!?
he has to change his ways, else he's bound to lose you for ever :)Please help! i want the abuse to stop?!!?
WHAT passion? Dump him and don't take him back next time. Tell him he doesn't know how to respect a woman and you have enough self worth to insist on being respected in your relationships.
Wake up girl.
He's told you what's going on. Move On! Because he will very soon. There is no passion to bring back.
Don't let yourself down by letting him belittle you.
Stand Up for yourself. If he is such a fool then you Move On and get yourself under control so you can meet a man that will respect you.
He told you he says that in anger, I'm sorry but you don't need that in your life. find someone else that will treat you better, and If you stay with him, he will keep on abusing you and apologizing to you. You have to start thinking whats best for you and it sure is not him, find someone move on.
Your instincts are correct. You don't feel like being intimate with him because is he not worthy of you.
Don't let your rationale confuse your common sense. He is very, very, very bad news.
There is not a man on this planet who is unkind, cruel and hurtful to the one he loves. That's not love in any interpretation.
You can't mistake love: the words--are loving, as is everything else about the relationship. that does not sound like what you have here.
Who says this stuff to his girlfriend?
And as for you, who wants to be manipulated, unsure of whether he meant it or not? Who wants to hear ugly things spoken to them? Who want s to hear that your relationship was just a joke? And, most specifically, who wants to be called names a woman shouldn't be called?
His apologies are great, but much like repeat offenders, if he was sincerely sorry, he would have stopped.
You already know what you should do, but in case you can't bring yourself to acknowlege what is right in front of you...it's time to pack up your love and affection AND intimacy, and take it to someone who really loves you. This person will be someone who values you, as a person, as a woman, and as a companion--intimate or not.
Also, you should value yourself more than this. Someplace there is a person who will speak to you as if you were the most treasured thing in the world. Words of love, of longterm committment, of respect. He may get angry from time to time, but he should have a way to release or diffuse his anger without verbally beating you up. I hope you find each other one day.
In the meantime, the decision is yours. Do what you think is best for you, regardless of what we say. I hope you make the right decision, the one you won't regret.
God bless you.
Hope this helps!
Well I'm a daughter of a father that was physically and verbally abusive to my mother and to me and my brother. He was like that until I was 13 years old. I would see my mother almost like a prisoner in her own home. He would come home and start in on her about things going on in the house and having dinner ready. He would call her all kind of names that little 3 and 2 year olds shouldn't hear. Then at times he would come at mom, trying to hug her and kiss her and be attentive and apologizing to her about his attitude. By that time the damage was done. Mama ha enough and she took us and moved. But then the funny thing about all this my mother became a verbal abuser too. She would admit to it herself, but she did. It was all because of the abuse she suffered from dad. I know that you are saying he's not physical with me, but hun abuse is abuse. It still tears down the self-esteem of a person and makes them turn into the total opposite of who they were before they met this person. It changes you and then you begin to see life in a whole new shade of Blue. It seems to me its already changing you. You are second guessing yourself and you are probably wondering if its your fault at times. Hun, if someone truly loves you they won't say things to hurt you and if they do it shouldn't be repeatly. I've been married for almost a decade and yes my husband has said things that hurt in an arguement, but it was a one time thing. When I'm with him he makes me feel like I'm wanted and if we argue he doesn't say anything that degrades me. If a man loves you he will respect you enough to not call you names or try to degrade you. Hun, evaluate things, go with your gut about your feelings, and if u see that he's not changing nothing says you have to stay there. hope this helps. Also, It changed me too and my brother. He got on drugs and started drinking, but before then he had emotional and anger issues, still does. Me, I tried to deny it, but I was craving for a male figure to truly love me. I became dependant of having that and ran into abusive relationships myself. Until I had enough. For almost a year I gave up on and went into the I don't care phase sleeping with men just to fill a void. That's a hard life to live and is dangerous too. Hun get out, you have the chance and the choice to make it offical and move on with your life. You don't need the love of a man to make you whole or keep you. Love yourself first then you'll be able to love a good man when he comes along. trust me I know what i am talking about. There are good ones out there just learn from this to not make the same mistake twice. Be blessed hun.
Girl, wake up! This is a dysfunctional relationship that has no chance of improving, first come the insults, then come the bruises! Leave him now before any babies come along and you'll have to have him in your life forever. It's hard, but be strong and don't answer his calls, avoid him at all costs and don't let him intimidate you or sweettalk you into giving him another chance. I went through this before, and when I finally got rid of him, it seemed like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. No sex is that good.
Sweetie, that's called verbal abuse and the wounds are just as real as physical abuse, only they take longer to heal because in order to heal, you have to replant a new thought system that allows you to believe contrary to the mean, cruel, demeaning things that were forced inside your mind about you.
A bruise heals over a short time, but mental abuse can change your feelings about yourself for the worse and it can take a lifetime to turn that around.
This is the thin end of the wedge, I am sorry to say, you can't stop anyone being abusive, that has to come from within them, having ';been there, done that'; I can honestly say it will probably get worse rather than better, and I would advise breaking the relationship now, far better to suffer a broken heart than a broken neck (or any other bone in your body) Broken bones are far more painful than a broken heart.
Honey, I went from an ';abusive step-mother'; to abusive husbands, all of my life, abused!! Until I got the backbone to leave and devorce my last husband!! And believe me he still want's me back, but it will be a ';Cold Day in Heck!!'; Before I ever go back to him!! I honestly dont know how to pick them, and I was verbally and physically abused too, so I know exactly what your going through, hun!! You need to get up the back bone to leave, no matter how trapped you feel, or how great the sex is, you deserve BETTER!!! No woman should have to go through what we've gone through!! If you need someone to talk too, I can try to help you to get out, by looking for shelter's or anything to help, if you want me too.. Just email me, at christyhorn@npgcable.com, and I'll try to do the ';Very Best, I can to get you out of there, okay!'; But you have to decide, if this is worth staying or not.. I cant make that decision for you.. You have to be good and sick of all of this bad enough to want out, hun!! Or no one can help you, you know.. Its only going to get worse, before it gets better, trust me on this one, and if you think for one minute you can change him, your only dreaming!!! Email me, hun....And I'll see what I can do too help you okay.. Smile, there's only the rest of your life with ';Sunny Days, ahead to look forward too!!'; Should you make the right choice!!!
Emotional abuse is just as bad as physical and eventually will leave you just as scarred .Don't take him back at all , it is just one step more to the physical abuse starting as well. If your looking to change him , that probably won't happen . If he wanted to change he would've already.As for you please talk to someone who is a pro at dealing with the emotionally abused , because without knowing it you may be doing him and you more damage by your taking him back and putting up with his destructive behavior. Wishing you all the luck and wisdom of the ages to deal with this before it's a much worse situation.
it starts with verbal abuse. when that stops working to scare and control you, it will evolve into physical abuse. if you want to end up in a battered womens shelter, by all means keep accepting his appolgies and taking him back. other wise you should run away from him as quickly as possible. if he treats you that way now, imagine 5 or 10 years down the road.
Too me he might be bi-polar or has an anger issue. Not saying that he does but something is up with him.
I think I would get out of this relationship. You guys really don't have a relationship anymore. He is just going to keep emotionally abusing you. I would just leave him. You don't need to be in a relationship with a person that calls you names and makes you try to leave him.
You are much better off without him.
If you really love him and want to stay with him then you two need to talk and tell him how when he says certain things it hurts you and ask him if he does really think that this relationship is a joke.
Are you crazy?! get away from that man! He will only get worse and make your life miserable! Find yourself a man who makes you feel beautiful and pampered, they are out there! You won't find one if your wasting all your time on this guy, who actually hates women anyway. You don't need to bring back the passion you need to dump him!
It sounds like there was never any passion to begin with. If it was a real relationship and he says he loves u than you have to know he doesnt, not if he can look you in the eye and say those things to you. that should tell you something. I couldnt even begin to think about stricking a passion with him.
because he has to get the last word in, he has ended up saying some pretty cruel things to me in the past. He has called me several nasty names (terms you should NEVER call a woman) and on 3 occasions he has made the comment about how he is trying to push me away, get me to leave him, or how the relationship was all a joke, he was just playin
everytime he comes back and apologizes, saying he just said those in anger.
How would you deal with your sig. other telling you the relationship was a joke? even if it is in anger, still hurts
does he mean it or is he just trying to hurt me?
anyhow i am loosing ALL Desire to be intimate with him, as you can imagine. how do we bring the passion back%26gt;Please help! i want the abuse to stop?!!?
he has to change his ways, else he's bound to lose you for ever :)Please help! i want the abuse to stop?!!?
WHAT passion? Dump him and don't take him back next time. Tell him he doesn't know how to respect a woman and you have enough self worth to insist on being respected in your relationships.
Wake up girl.
He's told you what's going on. Move On! Because he will very soon. There is no passion to bring back.
Don't let yourself down by letting him belittle you.
Stand Up for yourself. If he is such a fool then you Move On and get yourself under control so you can meet a man that will respect you.
He told you he says that in anger, I'm sorry but you don't need that in your life. find someone else that will treat you better, and If you stay with him, he will keep on abusing you and apologizing to you. You have to start thinking whats best for you and it sure is not him, find someone move on.
Your instincts are correct. You don't feel like being intimate with him because is he not worthy of you.
Don't let your rationale confuse your common sense. He is very, very, very bad news.
There is not a man on this planet who is unkind, cruel and hurtful to the one he loves. That's not love in any interpretation.
You can't mistake love: the words--are loving, as is everything else about the relationship. that does not sound like what you have here.
Who says this stuff to his girlfriend?
And as for you, who wants to be manipulated, unsure of whether he meant it or not? Who wants to hear ugly things spoken to them? Who want s to hear that your relationship was just a joke? And, most specifically, who wants to be called names a woman shouldn't be called?
His apologies are great, but much like repeat offenders, if he was sincerely sorry, he would have stopped.
You already know what you should do, but in case you can't bring yourself to acknowlege what is right in front of you...it's time to pack up your love and affection AND intimacy, and take it to someone who really loves you. This person will be someone who values you, as a person, as a woman, and as a companion--intimate or not.
Also, you should value yourself more than this. Someplace there is a person who will speak to you as if you were the most treasured thing in the world. Words of love, of longterm committment, of respect. He may get angry from time to time, but he should have a way to release or diffuse his anger without verbally beating you up. I hope you find each other one day.
In the meantime, the decision is yours. Do what you think is best for you, regardless of what we say. I hope you make the right decision, the one you won't regret.
God bless you.
Hope this helps!
Well I'm a daughter of a father that was physically and verbally abusive to my mother and to me and my brother. He was like that until I was 13 years old. I would see my mother almost like a prisoner in her own home. He would come home and start in on her about things going on in the house and having dinner ready. He would call her all kind of names that little 3 and 2 year olds shouldn't hear. Then at times he would come at mom, trying to hug her and kiss her and be attentive and apologizing to her about his attitude. By that time the damage was done. Mama ha enough and she took us and moved. But then the funny thing about all this my mother became a verbal abuser too. She would admit to it herself, but she did. It was all because of the abuse she suffered from dad. I know that you are saying he's not physical with me, but hun abuse is abuse. It still tears down the self-esteem of a person and makes them turn into the total opposite of who they were before they met this person. It changes you and then you begin to see life in a whole new shade of Blue. It seems to me its already changing you. You are second guessing yourself and you are probably wondering if its your fault at times. Hun, if someone truly loves you they won't say things to hurt you and if they do it shouldn't be repeatly. I've been married for almost a decade and yes my husband has said things that hurt in an arguement, but it was a one time thing. When I'm with him he makes me feel like I'm wanted and if we argue he doesn't say anything that degrades me. If a man loves you he will respect you enough to not call you names or try to degrade you. Hun, evaluate things, go with your gut about your feelings, and if u see that he's not changing nothing says you have to stay there. hope this helps. Also, It changed me too and my brother. He got on drugs and started drinking, but before then he had emotional and anger issues, still does. Me, I tried to deny it, but I was craving for a male figure to truly love me. I became dependant of having that and ran into abusive relationships myself. Until I had enough. For almost a year I gave up on and went into the I don't care phase sleeping with men just to fill a void. That's a hard life to live and is dangerous too. Hun get out, you have the chance and the choice to make it offical and move on with your life. You don't need the love of a man to make you whole or keep you. Love yourself first then you'll be able to love a good man when he comes along. trust me I know what i am talking about. There are good ones out there just learn from this to not make the same mistake twice. Be blessed hun.
Girl, wake up! This is a dysfunctional relationship that has no chance of improving, first come the insults, then come the bruises! Leave him now before any babies come along and you'll have to have him in your life forever. It's hard, but be strong and don't answer his calls, avoid him at all costs and don't let him intimidate you or sweettalk you into giving him another chance. I went through this before, and when I finally got rid of him, it seemed like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. No sex is that good.
Sweetie, that's called verbal abuse and the wounds are just as real as physical abuse, only they take longer to heal because in order to heal, you have to replant a new thought system that allows you to believe contrary to the mean, cruel, demeaning things that were forced inside your mind about you.
A bruise heals over a short time, but mental abuse can change your feelings about yourself for the worse and it can take a lifetime to turn that around.
This is the thin end of the wedge, I am sorry to say, you can't stop anyone being abusive, that has to come from within them, having ';been there, done that'; I can honestly say it will probably get worse rather than better, and I would advise breaking the relationship now, far better to suffer a broken heart than a broken neck (or any other bone in your body) Broken bones are far more painful than a broken heart.
Honey, I went from an ';abusive step-mother'; to abusive husbands, all of my life, abused!! Until I got the backbone to leave and devorce my last husband!! And believe me he still want's me back, but it will be a ';Cold Day in Heck!!'; Before I ever go back to him!! I honestly dont know how to pick them, and I was verbally and physically abused too, so I know exactly what your going through, hun!! You need to get up the back bone to leave, no matter how trapped you feel, or how great the sex is, you deserve BETTER!!! No woman should have to go through what we've gone through!! If you need someone to talk too, I can try to help you to get out, by looking for shelter's or anything to help, if you want me too.. Just email me, at christyhorn@npgcable.com, and I'll try to do the ';Very Best, I can to get you out of there, okay!'; But you have to decide, if this is worth staying or not.. I cant make that decision for you.. You have to be good and sick of all of this bad enough to want out, hun!! Or no one can help you, you know.. Its only going to get worse, before it gets better, trust me on this one, and if you think for one minute you can change him, your only dreaming!!! Email me, hun....And I'll see what I can do too help you okay.. Smile, there's only the rest of your life with ';Sunny Days, ahead to look forward too!!'; Should you make the right choice!!!
Emotional abuse is just as bad as physical and eventually will leave you just as scarred .Don't take him back at all , it is just one step more to the physical abuse starting as well. If your looking to change him , that probably won't happen . If he wanted to change he would've already.As for you please talk to someone who is a pro at dealing with the emotionally abused , because without knowing it you may be doing him and you more damage by your taking him back and putting up with his destructive behavior. Wishing you all the luck and wisdom of the ages to deal with this before it's a much worse situation.
it starts with verbal abuse. when that stops working to scare and control you, it will evolve into physical abuse. if you want to end up in a battered womens shelter, by all means keep accepting his appolgies and taking him back. other wise you should run away from him as quickly as possible. if he treats you that way now, imagine 5 or 10 years down the road.
Too me he might be bi-polar or has an anger issue. Not saying that he does but something is up with him.
I think I would get out of this relationship. You guys really don't have a relationship anymore. He is just going to keep emotionally abusing you. I would just leave him. You don't need to be in a relationship with a person that calls you names and makes you try to leave him.
You are much better off without him.
If you really love him and want to stay with him then you two need to talk and tell him how when he says certain things it hurts you and ask him if he does really think that this relationship is a joke.
Are you crazy?! get away from that man! He will only get worse and make your life miserable! Find yourself a man who makes you feel beautiful and pampered, they are out there! You won't find one if your wasting all your time on this guy, who actually hates women anyway. You don't need to bring back the passion you need to dump him!
It sounds like there was never any passion to begin with. If it was a real relationship and he says he loves u than you have to know he doesnt, not if he can look you in the eye and say those things to you. that should tell you something. I couldnt even begin to think about stricking a passion with him.
My boyfriend said really hurtful things to me help!?
we got in a fight because he saw a picture of my ex boyfriend on my phone naked. i just never got to delete it, and we were just arguing back and forth and he was saying that i make myself look so easy which is why he wanted to date me so he can get some but he fell in love with my personality and then he was like i can't even believe i'm going out with a kid (he's 22, i'm 17) i just thought you were hot, but i should've thought about how big your vagina is because you're so damn easy. and then he was like that's why your father abused you and every guy you've been with has cheated on you, you're a lying disgusting whore. i slapped the **** out of him and walked out, but i'm so hurt. i couldn't even see straight when i was driving to stay at my grandparents house because i refuse to stay at his apartment anymore. i was crying so hard, and i can't stop. just because i'm sexual and i like doing sexual things, and i'm pretty and i get a lot of guys that makes me a whore? i don't understand. we haven't broken up, but should i break up with him? my boyfriend thinks i'm a whore, is he just in it to have sex?My boyfriend said really hurtful things to me help!?
He probably was hurt, so when someone is hurt they say things to hurt you and break you down. It is emotional abuse and if you talk to him and he says it was your fault or he doesn't apologize to you then you shouldn't be with him anymore. Although if it was me I would of just left him. He was pissed off but I think he was saying a little too much, there is hurting someone feelings and then there is just overdoing it. And from going from dating a kid, to being abused by your father, to your pass relationships. He was just trying to say anything and is using your past against you.My boyfriend said really hurtful things to me help!?
guys always say things they dont mean ; if you guys are really in love who cares what you guys say to ech other its just words; i mean did you have more happy times or bad times ? just think about things and see how everything is; if your willing to stay with him then you should ; its up to you
Hes Prolly Just Upset.
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You're not a whore.
But you should leave him, even if he does apologize. You don't deserve that.
OMG dump that JERK!
obvious :( hes not a really decent guy
when ppl r mad they say what they are probably really thinking
he has fallen in love wid ur personality but then went to say all this other stuff which expalins why he wants to be with u/hy he even wanted u but to openly call u a cheap whore and make reference to the size of ur $%%26amp;*^^ is really unacceptable
i think its best to leave him coz he doesnt have any respect for u and thats degrading for sum1 to think about u in that way
just from now on try to be a more decent girl (proper, dont give ppl the wrong impression) and then ppl wont think about u in that way otherwise ul keep getting cheated on and disrespected...goshh i wudnt know what 2 do if that ever happened to me!! so ur quite a strong person :( :(
Look, you have to learn this sooner or later.
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR ACTIONS
Now, I don't know you. I have no clue if you are so sexually open as he said, but the image that you give will be what people see. Even if you are a saint you can't go off giving it to whoever comes around and think that no one has any right to think what they want.
What he said was hurtful, no doubt. He just said those things to get back at you because of what happened (Plus, he's your BF and find a naked guys pic in your phone, REALLY? You wouldn't be mad if that happened to you? Come on). Be responsible, be wise. You like sex? Fine! But be responsible about it. **** I like chocolate, but if my *** ate that all day I'd have diabetes and die by 30.myspace quizzes amortization
He probably was hurt, so when someone is hurt they say things to hurt you and break you down. It is emotional abuse and if you talk to him and he says it was your fault or he doesn't apologize to you then you shouldn't be with him anymore. Although if it was me I would of just left him. He was pissed off but I think he was saying a little too much, there is hurting someone feelings and then there is just overdoing it. And from going from dating a kid, to being abused by your father, to your pass relationships. He was just trying to say anything and is using your past against you.My boyfriend said really hurtful things to me help!?
guys always say things they dont mean ; if you guys are really in love who cares what you guys say to ech other its just words; i mean did you have more happy times or bad times ? just think about things and see how everything is; if your willing to stay with him then you should ; its up to you
Hes Prolly Just Upset.
Answer Mine? Pics
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?鈥?/a>
You're not a whore.
But you should leave him, even if he does apologize. You don't deserve that.
OMG dump that JERK!
obvious :( hes not a really decent guy
when ppl r mad they say what they are probably really thinking
he has fallen in love wid ur personality but then went to say all this other stuff which expalins why he wants to be with u/hy he even wanted u but to openly call u a cheap whore and make reference to the size of ur $%%26amp;*^^ is really unacceptable
i think its best to leave him coz he doesnt have any respect for u and thats degrading for sum1 to think about u in that way
just from now on try to be a more decent girl (proper, dont give ppl the wrong impression) and then ppl wont think about u in that way otherwise ul keep getting cheated on and disrespected...goshh i wudnt know what 2 do if that ever happened to me!! so ur quite a strong person :( :(
Look, you have to learn this sooner or later.
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR ACTIONS
Now, I don't know you. I have no clue if you are so sexually open as he said, but the image that you give will be what people see. Even if you are a saint you can't go off giving it to whoever comes around and think that no one has any right to think what they want.
What he said was hurtful, no doubt. He just said those things to get back at you because of what happened (Plus, he's your BF and find a naked guys pic in your phone, REALLY? You wouldn't be mad if that happened to you? Come on). Be responsible, be wise. You like sex? Fine! But be responsible about it. **** I like chocolate, but if my *** ate that all day I'd have diabetes and die by 30.
Please help! i want the abuse to stop?!!?
my boyfriend and I fight a lot. in my mind, he manipulates things and has to get the last word in the argument, no matter what the cost.
because he has to get the last word in, he has ended up saying some pretty cruel things to me in the past. He has called me several nasty names (terms you should NEVER call a woman) and on 3 occasions he has made the comment about how he is trying to push me away, get me to leave him, or how the relationship was all a joke, he was just playin
everytime he comes back and apologizes, saying he just said those in anger.
How would you deal with your sig. other telling you the relationship was a joke? even if it is in anger, still hurts
does he mean it or is he just trying to hurt me?
anyhow i am loosing ALL Desire to be intimate with him, as you can imagine. how do we bring the passion back%26gt;Please help! i want the abuse to stop?!!?
he has to change his ways, else he's bound to lose you for ever :)Please help! i want the abuse to stop?!!?
WHAT passion? Dump him and don't take him back next time. Tell him he doesn't know how to respect a woman and you have enough self worth to insist on being respected in your relationships.
Wake up girl.
He's told you what's going on. Move On! Because he will very soon. There is no passion to bring back.
Don't let yourself down by letting him belittle you.
Stand Up for yourself. If he is such a fool then you Move On and get yourself under control so you can meet a man that will respect you.
He told you he says that in anger, I'm sorry but you don't need that in your life. find someone else that will treat you better, and If you stay with him, he will keep on abusing you and apologizing to you. You have to start thinking whats best for you and it sure is not him, find someone move on.
Your instincts are correct. You don't feel like being intimate with him because is he not worthy of you.
Don't let your rationale confuse your common sense. He is very, very, very bad news.
There is not a man on this planet who is unkind, cruel and hurtful to the one he loves. That's not love in any interpretation.
You can't mistake love: the words--are loving, as is everything else about the relationship. that does not sound like what you have here.
Who says this stuff to his girlfriend?
And as for you, who wants to be manipulated, unsure of whether he meant it or not? Who wants to hear ugly things spoken to them? Who want s to hear that your relationship was just a joke? And, most specifically, who wants to be called names a woman shouldn't be called?
His apologies are great, but much like repeat offenders, if he was sincerely sorry, he would have stopped.
You already know what you should do, but in case you can't bring yourself to acknowlege what is right in front of you...it's time to pack up your love and affection AND intimacy, and take it to someone who really loves you. This person will be someone who values you, as a person, as a woman, and as a companion--intimate or not.
Also, you should value yourself more than this. Someplace there is a person who will speak to you as if you were the most treasured thing in the world. Words of love, of longterm committment, of respect. He may get angry from time to time, but he should have a way to release or diffuse his anger without verbally beating you up. I hope you find each other one day.
In the meantime, the decision is yours. Do what you think is best for you, regardless of what we say. I hope you make the right decision, the one you won't regret.
God bless you.
Hope this helps!
Well I'm a daughter of a father that was physically and verbally abusive to my mother and to me and my brother. He was like that until I was 13 years old. I would see my mother almost like a prisoner in her own home. He would come home and start in on her about things going on in the house and having dinner ready. He would call her all kind of names that little 3 and 2 year olds shouldn't hear. Then at times he would come at mom, trying to hug her and kiss her and be attentive and apologizing to her about his attitude. By that time the damage was done. Mama ha enough and she took us and moved. But then the funny thing about all this my mother became a verbal abuser too. She would admit to it herself, but she did. It was all because of the abuse she suffered from dad. I know that you are saying he's not physical with me, but hun abuse is abuse. It still tears down the self-esteem of a person and makes them turn into the total opposite of who they were before they met this person. It changes you and then you begin to see life in a whole new shade of Blue. It seems to me its already changing you. You are second guessing yourself and you are probably wondering if its your fault at times. Hun, if someone truly loves you they won't say things to hurt you and if they do it shouldn't be repeatly. I've been married for almost a decade and yes my husband has said things that hurt in an arguement, but it was a one time thing. When I'm with him he makes me feel like I'm wanted and if we argue he doesn't say anything that degrades me. If a man loves you he will respect you enough to not call you names or try to degrade you. Hun, evaluate things, go with your gut about your feelings, and if u see that he's not changing nothing says you have to stay there. hope this helps. Also, It changed me too and my brother. He got on drugs and started drinking, but before then he had emotional and anger issues, still does. Me, I tried to deny it, but I was craving for a male figure to truly love me. I became dependant of having that and ran into abusive relationships myself. Until I had enough. For almost a year I gave up on and went into the I don't care phase sleeping with men just to fill a void. That's a hard life to live and is dangerous too. Hun get out, you have the chance and the choice to make it offical and move on with your life. You don't need the love of a man to make you whole or keep you. Love yourself first then you'll be able to love a good man when he comes along. trust me I know what i am talking about. There are good ones out there just learn from this to not make the same mistake twice. Be blessed hun.
Girl, wake up! This is a dysfunctional relationship that has no chance of improving, first come the insults, then come the bruises! Leave him now before any babies come along and you'll have to have him in your life forever. It's hard, but be strong and don't answer his calls, avoid him at all costs and don't let him intimidate you or sweettalk you into giving him another chance. I went through this before, and when I finally got rid of him, it seemed like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. No sex is that good.
Sweetie, that's called verbal abuse and the wounds are just as real as physical abuse, only they take longer to heal because in order to heal, you have to replant a new thought system that allows you to believe contrary to the mean, cruel, demeaning things that were forced inside your mind about you.
A bruise heals over a short time, but mental abuse can change your feelings about yourself for the worse and it can take a lifetime to turn that around.
This is the thin end of the wedge, I am sorry to say, you can't stop anyone being abusive, that has to come from within them, having ';been there, done that'; I can honestly say it will probably get worse rather than better, and I would advise breaking the relationship now, far better to suffer a broken heart than a broken neck (or any other bone in your body) Broken bones are far more painful than a broken heart.
Honey, I went from an ';abusive step-mother'; to abusive husbands, all of my life, abused!! Until I got the backbone to leave and devorce my last husband!! And believe me he still want's me back, but it will be a ';Cold Day in Heck!!'; Before I ever go back to him!! I honestly dont know how to pick them, and I was verbally and physically abused too, so I know exactly what your going through, hun!! You need to get up the back bone to leave, no matter how trapped you feel, or how great the sex is, you deserve BETTER!!! No woman should have to go through what we've gone through!! If you need someone to talk too, I can try to help you to get out, by looking for shelter's or anything to help, if you want me too.. Just email me, at christyhorn@npgcable.com, and I'll try to do the ';Very Best, I can to get you out of there, okay!'; But you have to decide, if this is worth staying or not.. I cant make that decision for you.. You have to be good and sick of all of this bad enough to want out, hun!! Or no one can help you, you know.. Its only going to get worse, before it gets better, trust me on this one, and if you think for one minute you can change him, your only dreaming!!! Email me, hun....And I'll see what I can do too help you okay.. Smile, there's only the rest of your life with ';Sunny Days, ahead to look forward too!!'; Should you make the right choice!!!
Emotional abuse is just as bad as physical and eventually will leave you just as scarred .Don't take him back at all , it is just one step more to the physical abuse starting as well. If your looking to change him , that probably won't happen . If he wanted to change he would've already.As for you please talk to someone who is a pro at dealing with the emotionally abused , because without knowing it you may be doing him and you more damage by your taking him back and putting up with his destructive behavior. Wishing you all the luck and wisdom of the ages to deal with this before it's a much worse situation.
it starts with verbal abuse. when that stops working to scare and control you, it will evolve into physical abuse. if you want to end up in a battered womens shelter, by all means keep accepting his appolgies and taking him back. other wise you should run away from him as quickly as possible. if he treats you that way now, imagine 5 or 10 years down the road.
Too me he might be bi-polar or has an anger issue. Not saying that he does but something is up with him.
I think I would get out of this relationship. You guys really don't have a relationship anymore. He is just going to keep emotionally abusing you. I would just leave him. You don't need to be in a relationship with a person that calls you names and makes you try to leave him.
You are much better off without him.
If you really love him and want to stay with him then you two need to talk and tell him how when he says certain things it hurts you and ask him if he does really think that this relationship is a joke.
Are you crazy?! get away from that man! He will only get worse and make your life miserable! Find yourself a man who makes you feel beautiful and pampered, they are out there! You won't find one if your wasting all your time on this guy, who actually hates women anyway. You don't need to bring back the passion you need to dump him!
It sounds like there was never any passion to begin with. If it was a real relationship and he says he loves u than you have to know he doesnt, not if he can look you in the eye and say those things to you. that should tell you something. I couldnt even begin to think about stricking a passion with him.
because he has to get the last word in, he has ended up saying some pretty cruel things to me in the past. He has called me several nasty names (terms you should NEVER call a woman) and on 3 occasions he has made the comment about how he is trying to push me away, get me to leave him, or how the relationship was all a joke, he was just playin
everytime he comes back and apologizes, saying he just said those in anger.
How would you deal with your sig. other telling you the relationship was a joke? even if it is in anger, still hurts
does he mean it or is he just trying to hurt me?
anyhow i am loosing ALL Desire to be intimate with him, as you can imagine. how do we bring the passion back%26gt;Please help! i want the abuse to stop?!!?
he has to change his ways, else he's bound to lose you for ever :)Please help! i want the abuse to stop?!!?
WHAT passion? Dump him and don't take him back next time. Tell him he doesn't know how to respect a woman and you have enough self worth to insist on being respected in your relationships.
Wake up girl.
He's told you what's going on. Move On! Because he will very soon. There is no passion to bring back.
Don't let yourself down by letting him belittle you.
Stand Up for yourself. If he is such a fool then you Move On and get yourself under control so you can meet a man that will respect you.
He told you he says that in anger, I'm sorry but you don't need that in your life. find someone else that will treat you better, and If you stay with him, he will keep on abusing you and apologizing to you. You have to start thinking whats best for you and it sure is not him, find someone move on.
Your instincts are correct. You don't feel like being intimate with him because is he not worthy of you.
Don't let your rationale confuse your common sense. He is very, very, very bad news.
There is not a man on this planet who is unkind, cruel and hurtful to the one he loves. That's not love in any interpretation.
You can't mistake love: the words--are loving, as is everything else about the relationship. that does not sound like what you have here.
Who says this stuff to his girlfriend?
And as for you, who wants to be manipulated, unsure of whether he meant it or not? Who wants to hear ugly things spoken to them? Who want s to hear that your relationship was just a joke? And, most specifically, who wants to be called names a woman shouldn't be called?
His apologies are great, but much like repeat offenders, if he was sincerely sorry, he would have stopped.
You already know what you should do, but in case you can't bring yourself to acknowlege what is right in front of you...it's time to pack up your love and affection AND intimacy, and take it to someone who really loves you. This person will be someone who values you, as a person, as a woman, and as a companion--intimate or not.
Also, you should value yourself more than this. Someplace there is a person who will speak to you as if you were the most treasured thing in the world. Words of love, of longterm committment, of respect. He may get angry from time to time, but he should have a way to release or diffuse his anger without verbally beating you up. I hope you find each other one day.
In the meantime, the decision is yours. Do what you think is best for you, regardless of what we say. I hope you make the right decision, the one you won't regret.
God bless you.
Hope this helps!
Well I'm a daughter of a father that was physically and verbally abusive to my mother and to me and my brother. He was like that until I was 13 years old. I would see my mother almost like a prisoner in her own home. He would come home and start in on her about things going on in the house and having dinner ready. He would call her all kind of names that little 3 and 2 year olds shouldn't hear. Then at times he would come at mom, trying to hug her and kiss her and be attentive and apologizing to her about his attitude. By that time the damage was done. Mama ha enough and she took us and moved. But then the funny thing about all this my mother became a verbal abuser too. She would admit to it herself, but she did. It was all because of the abuse she suffered from dad. I know that you are saying he's not physical with me, but hun abuse is abuse. It still tears down the self-esteem of a person and makes them turn into the total opposite of who they were before they met this person. It changes you and then you begin to see life in a whole new shade of Blue. It seems to me its already changing you. You are second guessing yourself and you are probably wondering if its your fault at times. Hun, if someone truly loves you they won't say things to hurt you and if they do it shouldn't be repeatly. I've been married for almost a decade and yes my husband has said things that hurt in an arguement, but it was a one time thing. When I'm with him he makes me feel like I'm wanted and if we argue he doesn't say anything that degrades me. If a man loves you he will respect you enough to not call you names or try to degrade you. Hun, evaluate things, go with your gut about your feelings, and if u see that he's not changing nothing says you have to stay there. hope this helps. Also, It changed me too and my brother. He got on drugs and started drinking, but before then he had emotional and anger issues, still does. Me, I tried to deny it, but I was craving for a male figure to truly love me. I became dependant of having that and ran into abusive relationships myself. Until I had enough. For almost a year I gave up on and went into the I don't care phase sleeping with men just to fill a void. That's a hard life to live and is dangerous too. Hun get out, you have the chance and the choice to make it offical and move on with your life. You don't need the love of a man to make you whole or keep you. Love yourself first then you'll be able to love a good man when he comes along. trust me I know what i am talking about. There are good ones out there just learn from this to not make the same mistake twice. Be blessed hun.
Girl, wake up! This is a dysfunctional relationship that has no chance of improving, first come the insults, then come the bruises! Leave him now before any babies come along and you'll have to have him in your life forever. It's hard, but be strong and don't answer his calls, avoid him at all costs and don't let him intimidate you or sweettalk you into giving him another chance. I went through this before, and when I finally got rid of him, it seemed like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. No sex is that good.
Sweetie, that's called verbal abuse and the wounds are just as real as physical abuse, only they take longer to heal because in order to heal, you have to replant a new thought system that allows you to believe contrary to the mean, cruel, demeaning things that were forced inside your mind about you.
A bruise heals over a short time, but mental abuse can change your feelings about yourself for the worse and it can take a lifetime to turn that around.
This is the thin end of the wedge, I am sorry to say, you can't stop anyone being abusive, that has to come from within them, having ';been there, done that'; I can honestly say it will probably get worse rather than better, and I would advise breaking the relationship now, far better to suffer a broken heart than a broken neck (or any other bone in your body) Broken bones are far more painful than a broken heart.
Honey, I went from an ';abusive step-mother'; to abusive husbands, all of my life, abused!! Until I got the backbone to leave and devorce my last husband!! And believe me he still want's me back, but it will be a ';Cold Day in Heck!!'; Before I ever go back to him!! I honestly dont know how to pick them, and I was verbally and physically abused too, so I know exactly what your going through, hun!! You need to get up the back bone to leave, no matter how trapped you feel, or how great the sex is, you deserve BETTER!!! No woman should have to go through what we've gone through!! If you need someone to talk too, I can try to help you to get out, by looking for shelter's or anything to help, if you want me too.. Just email me, at christyhorn@npgcable.com, and I'll try to do the ';Very Best, I can to get you out of there, okay!'; But you have to decide, if this is worth staying or not.. I cant make that decision for you.. You have to be good and sick of all of this bad enough to want out, hun!! Or no one can help you, you know.. Its only going to get worse, before it gets better, trust me on this one, and if you think for one minute you can change him, your only dreaming!!! Email me, hun....And I'll see what I can do too help you okay.. Smile, there's only the rest of your life with ';Sunny Days, ahead to look forward too!!'; Should you make the right choice!!!
Emotional abuse is just as bad as physical and eventually will leave you just as scarred .Don't take him back at all , it is just one step more to the physical abuse starting as well. If your looking to change him , that probably won't happen . If he wanted to change he would've already.As for you please talk to someone who is a pro at dealing with the emotionally abused , because without knowing it you may be doing him and you more damage by your taking him back and putting up with his destructive behavior. Wishing you all the luck and wisdom of the ages to deal with this before it's a much worse situation.
it starts with verbal abuse. when that stops working to scare and control you, it will evolve into physical abuse. if you want to end up in a battered womens shelter, by all means keep accepting his appolgies and taking him back. other wise you should run away from him as quickly as possible. if he treats you that way now, imagine 5 or 10 years down the road.
Too me he might be bi-polar or has an anger issue. Not saying that he does but something is up with him.
I think I would get out of this relationship. You guys really don't have a relationship anymore. He is just going to keep emotionally abusing you. I would just leave him. You don't need to be in a relationship with a person that calls you names and makes you try to leave him.
You are much better off without him.
If you really love him and want to stay with him then you two need to talk and tell him how when he says certain things it hurts you and ask him if he does really think that this relationship is a joke.
Are you crazy?! get away from that man! He will only get worse and make your life miserable! Find yourself a man who makes you feel beautiful and pampered, they are out there! You won't find one if your wasting all your time on this guy, who actually hates women anyway. You don't need to bring back the passion you need to dump him!
It sounds like there was never any passion to begin with. If it was a real relationship and he says he loves u than you have to know he doesnt, not if he can look you in the eye and say those things to you. that should tell you something. I couldnt even begin to think about stricking a passion with him.
How can I stop thinking of him?
I broke up with my boyfriend 2 weeks ago because we were fighting too much. He has a very bad temper, and I felt like nothing I can do would get him to treat me properly. He screams at me for no reason, and talks down to me. When things are good, he is the most gentle human being, but the bad started outweighing the good.
On top of that, he has a daughter with serious baby mama drama.
I felt like I try so hard to be comfortable with all his drama, that when he treats me with disrespect and yells at me just because he is temperamental, I realized I was getting no where.
So I ended it. We didnt end things because we didnt love each other anymore, we ended things because I knew if I stayed, I would be allowing him to treat me that way.
I cant shake the loneliness I feel about being without him. I have gotten asked out three times by other men already, and I've decided to go for it, but the pang in my heart wont go away. I still love him so much, even though I know we cant be together. I just want the feeling to go away.
How can you accept that even if you love each other, things just arent meant to be?
How do you accept that without having your heart crumble into a million pieces and leave you so miserable and alone and cold?
We were together for 8 months, and I wanted to be with him forever.
What should I do to put my heart back together again?How can I stop thinking of him?
You have to give yourself more time to heal. It's not going to be easy but worth it in the end. You deserve someone that will treat you right. It sounds like a good thing you ended the relationship. He has his own issues to contend with...let him go. You will get over him in time. Sorry..there's no easy way to get over someone..only time will help. Hope this helps...How can I stop thinking of him?
it is to much fot u to deal with, remember that time heals all wounds and thats a fact. try getting a rebound boyfriend to take ur mind off him.trust me waht u did by ending th relationship was for the best i promise.
i know it easy to say find someone else, or better get busy with some hobby to take your mind of problem for some time.. get gym membership all kinds of people there you can meet
Hi,
You will need to grieve the relationship. But you can help yourself get over it. You can re-establish old friendships, and go out with the girls. Don't think about a new man yet, you need time to get over the old one.
Keep yourself busy, work out, go for walks, do things that will boost your self esteem.
Try some volunteer work. I often suggest this because seeing other peoples problems can put your into perspective sometimes.
If you visit the site in the source box, they have a free ebook called Personal Development Advice which may help you rebuild things for yourself.
Best wishes,
Red Stripe
I too, am going thru something similar and the drama alone is not worth it! It's going to be hard, however, time really does help to move on. Love is a strange and powerful thing but if you aren't right for each other, you're not. Let go and let God, Easier said than done, I know but He can do all things if we just let Him.
You can do this, just take it day by day! Take care of yourself and God bless you :)
I have somewhat the same problem...not because he snaps at me or anything like that... he is the best guy ever %26amp; I love him...but I might have to let go of him because of other reasons. I don't know %26amp; have not fully decided yet.
In your case, you did what you had to do. You have to think of yourself first. Move on...it is painful now but you will get over it. We all do if we have to;-)
Best of luck!
On top of that, he has a daughter with serious baby mama drama.
I felt like I try so hard to be comfortable with all his drama, that when he treats me with disrespect and yells at me just because he is temperamental, I realized I was getting no where.
So I ended it. We didnt end things because we didnt love each other anymore, we ended things because I knew if I stayed, I would be allowing him to treat me that way.
I cant shake the loneliness I feel about being without him. I have gotten asked out three times by other men already, and I've decided to go for it, but the pang in my heart wont go away. I still love him so much, even though I know we cant be together. I just want the feeling to go away.
How can you accept that even if you love each other, things just arent meant to be?
How do you accept that without having your heart crumble into a million pieces and leave you so miserable and alone and cold?
We were together for 8 months, and I wanted to be with him forever.
What should I do to put my heart back together again?How can I stop thinking of him?
You have to give yourself more time to heal. It's not going to be easy but worth it in the end. You deserve someone that will treat you right. It sounds like a good thing you ended the relationship. He has his own issues to contend with...let him go. You will get over him in time. Sorry..there's no easy way to get over someone..only time will help. Hope this helps...How can I stop thinking of him?
it is to much fot u to deal with, remember that time heals all wounds and thats a fact. try getting a rebound boyfriend to take ur mind off him.trust me waht u did by ending th relationship was for the best i promise.
i know it easy to say find someone else, or better get busy with some hobby to take your mind of problem for some time.. get gym membership all kinds of people there you can meet
Hi,
You will need to grieve the relationship. But you can help yourself get over it. You can re-establish old friendships, and go out with the girls. Don't think about a new man yet, you need time to get over the old one.
Keep yourself busy, work out, go for walks, do things that will boost your self esteem.
Try some volunteer work. I often suggest this because seeing other peoples problems can put your into perspective sometimes.
If you visit the site in the source box, they have a free ebook called Personal Development Advice which may help you rebuild things for yourself.
Best wishes,
Red Stripe
I too, am going thru something similar and the drama alone is not worth it! It's going to be hard, however, time really does help to move on. Love is a strange and powerful thing but if you aren't right for each other, you're not. Let go and let God, Easier said than done, I know but He can do all things if we just let Him.
You can do this, just take it day by day! Take care of yourself and God bless you :)
I have somewhat the same problem...not because he snaps at me or anything like that... he is the best guy ever %26amp; I love him...but I might have to let go of him because of other reasons. I don't know %26amp; have not fully decided yet.
In your case, you did what you had to do. You have to think of yourself first. Move on...it is painful now but you will get over it. We all do if we have to;-)
Best of luck!
My mom makes me feel horrible, how do I make her stop ?
My mother is 47 years old. She's a mother of two daughters a 16 year old ( me ) and a 4 year old ( my half-sister ) My mother is un-employed and cares for my sister half the time. My step-dad is the only working person in our family. He hardly helps out with my sister. He didn't want her in the first place.
I'm not sure if my mom has menopause or is having a mid-life crisis or what, but lately she's been very dare I say, mean.
Over the summer my boyfriend of 9 months broke up with me. He was my first love and we liked each other for 5 long years. My mom really liked my boyfriend ( we grew up together for 10 years ). However, when he broke up with me I called my mom the next day and told her what happened and cried my heart out to her. After that call, I stopped calling her. I stopped calling everyone. I needed to be by myself. She called one day, and was upset that I didn't call. She said I didn't care for my little sister ( since i wasn't talking to anyone ) and grew even more upset when I told her I needed some alone time. She then said '; With an attitude like that, no wonder james dumped you ! ';
She's said that several times. Once when she picked me up from school she asked me how my day went. I was reluctant to tell her because it didn't go so well. I calmly told her '; I'm sorry, mom, I don't want to talk about it. '; She grew angry '; Tell me how your day went ! '; '; Mom, I don't want to talk about it ! '; '; I DEMAND YOU TELL ME ! '; '; Mom, please stop it. '; '; you know what ? no boy wants a girl like you ! with an attitude like that ! '; Somehow I managed to remain calm '; Mom, please stop. You know, there's lots of kids who don't tell their moms anything.. I'll tell you when I feel comfortable '; '; NO, YOU'LL TELL ME NOW '; and we broke out into a fight. ( All I asked her to do was stop, and let the conversation drop but she wanted to keep it going. )
I can usually take things she says to me, but when she mentions low-blows like my boyfriend or something I've done in the past ( like when I called her a *****, after she threw a hardcover book at my head ) which, btw. SHE NEVER FORGETS. If i make a single mistake in the past she never lets it go and brings it up and makes me feel horrible about it.
How do I make her stop? I tell her some things she says, it hurts me and she says I'm over-sensitive and starts another fight with me.My mom makes me feel horrible, how do I make her stop ?
First of all, I am really sorry you are going through this.
Now, I just want to say, from your mom's perspective, it sounds like she has very low self-esteem and doesn't understand how her words are hurting you. It's hard, but you have to try not to take what she says to heart. Turn it around and think ';Wow, she must really be feeling lousy to be talking to me this way.'; For some reason, she is a very unhappy person, maybe because of what happened with your dad, or maybe her relationship with your step-dad hasn't been the greatest. She is probably under a lot of stress and is taking it out on you.
Now, there's no excuse for the way she is treating you. I just want you to not let it affect the way you see yourself. Think of it this way---when she acts like that, it says a lot more about her than it does about you. How sad and pathetic she must be to not even be able to treat her own daughter with respect?
What can you do? Well, you don't have to engage in an argument. You can give her a quick answer like ';My day was fine';. If she bugs you, say you have a bad headache and want to get home to lie down. She is pushing you away because you are not going to want to confide in her because of fear of how she will react. But I think you have to be cool just to protect yourself.
Remember, it's not you, it's her!
Good luck.
I'm not sure if my mom has menopause or is having a mid-life crisis or what, but lately she's been very dare I say, mean.
Over the summer my boyfriend of 9 months broke up with me. He was my first love and we liked each other for 5 long years. My mom really liked my boyfriend ( we grew up together for 10 years ). However, when he broke up with me I called my mom the next day and told her what happened and cried my heart out to her. After that call, I stopped calling her. I stopped calling everyone. I needed to be by myself. She called one day, and was upset that I didn't call. She said I didn't care for my little sister ( since i wasn't talking to anyone ) and grew even more upset when I told her I needed some alone time. She then said '; With an attitude like that, no wonder james dumped you ! ';
She's said that several times. Once when she picked me up from school she asked me how my day went. I was reluctant to tell her because it didn't go so well. I calmly told her '; I'm sorry, mom, I don't want to talk about it. '; She grew angry '; Tell me how your day went ! '; '; Mom, I don't want to talk about it ! '; '; I DEMAND YOU TELL ME ! '; '; Mom, please stop it. '; '; you know what ? no boy wants a girl like you ! with an attitude like that ! '; Somehow I managed to remain calm '; Mom, please stop. You know, there's lots of kids who don't tell their moms anything.. I'll tell you when I feel comfortable '; '; NO, YOU'LL TELL ME NOW '; and we broke out into a fight. ( All I asked her to do was stop, and let the conversation drop but she wanted to keep it going. )
I can usually take things she says to me, but when she mentions low-blows like my boyfriend or something I've done in the past ( like when I called her a *****, after she threw a hardcover book at my head ) which, btw. SHE NEVER FORGETS. If i make a single mistake in the past she never lets it go and brings it up and makes me feel horrible about it.
How do I make her stop? I tell her some things she says, it hurts me and she says I'm over-sensitive and starts another fight with me.My mom makes me feel horrible, how do I make her stop ?
First of all, I am really sorry you are going through this.
Now, I just want to say, from your mom's perspective, it sounds like she has very low self-esteem and doesn't understand how her words are hurting you. It's hard, but you have to try not to take what she says to heart. Turn it around and think ';Wow, she must really be feeling lousy to be talking to me this way.'; For some reason, she is a very unhappy person, maybe because of what happened with your dad, or maybe her relationship with your step-dad hasn't been the greatest. She is probably under a lot of stress and is taking it out on you.
Now, there's no excuse for the way she is treating you. I just want you to not let it affect the way you see yourself. Think of it this way---when she acts like that, it says a lot more about her than it does about you. How sad and pathetic she must be to not even be able to treat her own daughter with respect?
What can you do? Well, you don't have to engage in an argument. You can give her a quick answer like ';My day was fine';. If she bugs you, say you have a bad headache and want to get home to lie down. She is pushing you away because you are not going to want to confide in her because of fear of how she will react. But I think you have to be cool just to protect yourself.
Remember, it's not you, it's her!
Good luck.
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